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Question to Dear Kathy!
August 12, 2005
5:37 pm
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forever and a day
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my intention was never to abuse or to be abused. I agree there is enough of this outside of this place... what did i do to you in the first place do you care to tell me that. I have no idea who you are or why you felt i shold not be here to begin with. i am very afraid to be else where and if you would like to know I have tried to go to other support groups and got hurt in the mean time.. this WAS the only place where i felt safe..

as to your safety here.. i never intened not once to make you feel unsafe or abused, i would not wish that upon anyone.. believe me I know what it feels like to be attacked in all directions.. I did not wish to injure you in any way. I wish that had gone both ways. I do admit that I am a bit sensitive these days and after rereading the threads can see where I could have over reacted just a little,, that is something I must accept as my own actions that I am accountable for on my own.. I will admit to that.. but I feel as if I have been tossed aside and no longer welcome here due to this and at this point and time I am left feeling rather desperate right now.. I am not in a good way right now and am sorry for what ever it is that I did..once again it is me who is always the one who is wrong.. just like with matts death maybe it is me who was wrong. maybe they were all right and maybe it is me who is to blame for his death.. isnt it just the same .. someone has to be to blame.

August 12, 2005
5:47 pm
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forever and a day
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funny how yo managed to make it seem like I had done something to have somehow deserved this type of treatment. I did not try in any way to hurt you and still wish you no harm.. I am very sorry about your mother very much so...

I was just saying that I felt as if you had an issue with me that you should have taken it up with me, and so be it.

whats been said is done and over with there is nothing we can do about it now but if you choose to claim that I am the one who attacked you then you are very very wrong about that.. I dont even know who you are.. and to tell you the truth I am hurting enough today with REAL issues that I could care less about your Ways of trying to be controlling. I had thought that we were all supposed to be equal on this site to begin with so why do you so choose to tell me otherwise..
i just wish you cold see to it end this once and for all either by me going away or by you resolving this matter.

August 12, 2005
5:54 pm
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lollipop3
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Hi Forever,

I'm sorry that you are hurting. I agree with everyone here that Kathy did not mean to offend you and was only offering her suggestions the best way she knows how.

You have been addressed by just about everyone here, trying to get you to see that perhaps you may have misunderstood, but you don't seem to want to hear it. At this point, your many posts toward kathy are abusive.

Everyone here has told you that you are welcome here and that they wish you would stay.

What more would you like us to do?

If you tell us what you need instead of insisting that you have been hurt and people want you to leave this site, perhaps this issue can be solved and we can all begin to heal and learn from this.

Good luck,
Lolli

August 12, 2005
6:02 pm
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gazelle
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Oh no, that is not true. We all die sometime, from this sojourn in this world at least; and if that is the way of the Universe and our Path towards our ultimate Goal & spiritual Home (however perceived) - than please do NOTpersonal take any blame for your husband's natural place in the structure of reality - you poor, suffering, bereaved, hurting sister!

It is NOT your fault in any way! What happened, happened. You mean well, and wish well, and long & yearn for Healing & Goodness - just like the best of humanity always has.

Please have faith that things WILL get better! Hang in there, girl. Be strong. Be a spiritual warrior & pilgrim. Be true to your Higher Self and any Higher Power or God that you hold dear. Brave and lonely soul - hold fast to your personal faith, Hope & Love.

All suffering: "This too shall pass."

The great mystic lady, Julian of Norwich, famously stated from her Vision:
"All shall be well; and all shall be well; and all manner of thing shall be well."

I wish you abundant blessings of comfort, healing and personal understanding & growth on your journey to perfection & Happiness.

Blessings of Love to you - gazelle.

August 12, 2005
6:03 pm
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gazelle
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this was to your last-but-2 post.

August 12, 2005
6:14 pm
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D dog
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Well said, Lolli. I agree, 4ever - help is here if you choose to accept it. If not, please know there is no room for abuse here.

And FYI - all of our issues here are REAL. Please afford the rest of us the same respect we have shown you.

Thank you and take care -

D.

August 12, 2005
7:17 pm
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forever and a day
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Please believe me that no disrespect was or ever will be intended.. This goes for every one.. I am in a bad way today and am very sorry to have behaved the way that I had.. I feel like the whole world is out to get me and that the one source of comfort had been threatend. I honestly have no where else to turn to and became very afraid.. I feel so alone right now and its so very hard for me to know who I can honestly count on as a true friend and one who will turn on me anymore. I had not intended for it to include any of you. please accept my appology.. and believe me when I say that I am not a hurtful person and by nature am am very kind and considerate.. I am having a hard time right now and became very defensive. For that I was out of line. Please forgive me. I never intended to cause anyone harm.

August 13, 2005
11:41 am
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kathygy
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forever,

Your words "kathy I hope you and your busy body attitude have enough now to talk about.. I did not even know you and you did not even know me so what do you feel justified your reason for insulting me.. you are a mean and nasty person and you should be ashamed of yourself". These words are abusive and do not belong on this web site. I do not appreciate being called a mean and nasty person! None of which is true about me. This is considered name calling and not allowed on this web site. You say you don't want to hurt anyone but then you say things like this. Please read the guidelines before making statements like this. I have no idea why you would choose to call me those names. I will not be your scape goat for your pain. I do not deserve this. I have nothing to be ashamed of. I do not know what you are talking about. I feel very angry at you for all of these untrue judgements of me and abusive words.

August 13, 2005
12:02 pm
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Sunnysunshine
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Dear kathy,

I am sorry you had to go throught this...

But please read forever's thread "Re: Kathys last post"

I think.. with your help she was able to see a way to another step in her life!

Big big hugs to you and forever!~~~

Sunny

August 13, 2005
12:15 pm
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forever and a day
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Thanks for the effort but it is not any use.. I have done my part to let it be known that I had a change of heart and I know she has read about this.. I have now got to realize that I may have forced my way out of here whether I like it or not.. One might say this site isnt big enough for the 2 of us.. its a shame because I felt as if I had finally found a place.. it is no ones fault but my own and I must live with that,, Kathy has made it quite clear that SHE does not want me here anymore..

August 13, 2005
12:28 pm
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lollipop3
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Forever,

Some people just cannot get along.....that is life. It happens in the real world as well as on this site.

Having said that......Just because you and Kathy don't see eye to eye does not mean that you have to leave this site.

Another, more mature, approach would be to stop posting to each other. Just let it go.

This place is big enough for everyone whether we all agree with each other or not.

If you choose to leave, that is your choice and no one else's.

Lolli

August 13, 2005
3:27 pm
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exoticflower
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Dear Kathygy,

With all of this especially I have been thinking about defensiveness and reading into what people say and the ways in which I do that myself at times. I know for me I hear the disaproval I feel for myself in other people when they offer suggestions sometimes. And then I thought about our own (much smaller) misunderstanding from before (it goes hand in hand with this in some ways, though I think we delt with it very well and I know I took a lot of possitive from it, even more when I am thinking along these lines now). It made me really want to extend a sincere appology to you about our exchanges, I know that a lot of it was my own insecurity turning something you noticed as maybe needing some attention and me choosing to hear from you the disaproval I was feeling for myself at that time. I think one drama at a time is still more than any gal can handle, so I hope this appology can help some where you may feel hurt right now.

August 13, 2005
5:58 pm
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kathygy
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exoticflower,

You are a wonderful person. I am deeply moved by your apology. Thank you so much for what you said. I wish only the best for you.

love,
kathy

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