Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Question about No Contact
February 1, 2007
2:45 am
Avatar
ceh964
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Can I do No Contact while living under the same roof?? That probably sounds crazy (proof that I am going crazy). I am living in a seperate bedroom. I am so sick and tired of having my buttons pushed. My husband is definetely NPD. He feeds off of getting a rise out of me. It is like his fix or something. Everytime I take a step forward and end up snapping on him, I feel I am taking 2 steps back. Anyone with any advice? I am trying not to make any decisions in haste and anger. I am trying to carefully plan my moves at this point and I don't need the stress he is causing me.

February 1, 2007
3:32 am
Avatar
thetbeav
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I have been reading a Patricia Evans book about verbal abuse, and it does say that they feel a satisfaction from either pissing you off or making you cry. I don't know why that was a shock to read, but it's obviously true.

I don't have any advise for you though. I'm sorry. I would just keep what you're doing for now until you can your plan together. Just stay away as much as possible. Sorry you're having to deal with this. It does suck!

And you are NOT crazy! Maybe if you give me some specifics of what types of things he says or does to push your buttons, I can give you advise I've read. Sorry I can't be more helpful... 🙁

February 1, 2007
6:59 am
Avatar
camino
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I have been sharing a house with my huband for five months now and while it is difficult, it has been possible simply because I knew that it was going to end once the house was sold. It just has and we will be moving our own way.

February 1, 2007
10:26 am
Avatar
taj64
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

It is not really no contact if you live with him. In fact you are really not moving forward if you live with someone you have broken up with and still share housing. To me, it is still a means of hanging on. I think what you are doing is called detachment or taking a break from being intimate. I think it works if you are trying to think about things separately but cannot officially make a break. I look at it as inbetween stage, not really breaking up but not together either. It does not sound like he treats you very well, so this would be a good time to examine your possibilities.

February 1, 2007
10:58 am
Avatar
ceh964
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

thetbeav - thanks for responding. Basically, he is a 5 year old. We own a business together. Actually, this is what I thought it was going to be. Actually, HE owns the business. I was just necessary because his credit is all screwed up and he needed me to put my name on everything to do with the business. One example I can give you is we make an agreement on how to proceed with anything related to the business. He will give me his word on things and the minute he feels like it he will do the opposite without consulting me. Then when I have a problem with it, he says I just want "my way" and that I am just controlling. It makes me want to squeeze is head.

Camino-I am trying to stay focused on the big picture-that this is not forever. Thanks.

taj64-That is why I was asking. It does not seem possible to move forward this way. I feel like I am just spinning my wheels. The official break depends on finances, as I stated we own a business together. Figuring out what the hell to do with that situation will be the final break. Thanks for the advice.

February 1, 2007
12:40 pm
Avatar
nappy
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Your husband knows what he is doing. And he is going to keep doing it until he breaks you. So if you two own a business together, then that is exactly what it will be (business)
He will drive you crazy until he gets his other half of the business. But I wouldn't play his game.
How long has you and your husband been married?

How long have you been putting up with his behavior?

How long have you been knowing that he is like this?

How long have you been codependent?

February 1, 2007
9:16 pm
Avatar
ceh964
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Nappy- We have been married since 7/14/06. We have had the business for about 2 years. It is a Heating and Air Conditioning business, which I know absolutley nothing about. His behavior? well,since right after the wedding. It was his idea for the wedding in the first place. I have no idea why he married me. He already had gotten all I had to give. I have been codependent for as long as I can remember. Thanks for asking.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
28
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110960
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38560
Posts: 714252
Newest Members:
Cannabeme, charli55, SeaG1ant, shawncanwe, lianot, dagaf
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information