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Pleaser
November 11, 2005
9:39 pm
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enoch
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Pleaser
Hope you slept well. Tell me more of your story.
Here's the story
I think, aka speculation, is that she had a string of abusive relationships. And when we started to talk about getting married she freaked. I started to push which she saw as abuse and I must confess that I was abusive when we would fight, and I lecture when I am afraid.
I think she ran away
1 to put some distance between us and to settle her mind and
2 she is also a people pleaser, who is drawn to dependents of all kinds. B's partner is a female, a drunk, and lives wherever there is a free place to sleep, The perfect rescue, which is the form her people pleasing takes.

Her leaving is still very painful. but she says that she will go back for counseling and will come to church with me on Sunday. We'll see.

I hate that I am so double minded and my faith weak. I know that God is in control and I see his hand in all of this, but I am still so fearful of what B will do, even more that G is saying no, not this one.

Enoch

November 12, 2005
7:34 am
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Pleaser
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Enoch

I read back on your story last night, I was amazed you seemed to have a wife at some stage with a drink problem. Is this the same lady that entry was back in June. I will post l8r. I slept well but also think I am being drawn to this site and it worry's me a bit.

Pleaser

November 12, 2005
7:34 am
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Enoch

I read back on your story last night, I was amazed you seemed to have a wife at some stage with a drink problem. Is this the same lady that entry was back in June. I will post l8r. I slept well but also think I am being drawn to this site and it worry's me a bit.

Pleaser

November 12, 2005
9:27 am
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enoch
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Pleaser
I know what you mean about being drawn to the sight. I drop by when things are really tough, since I can be somewhat anonymous here is a safe place for me to express what's going on.
B would never admit to having a drinking problem. But each of her life's problems always involved alcohol. When we met alcohol was consumed all of the time. We stopped for the past couple of years, and I continue to remain sober. I have no idea whether she is drinking again. But her 'business parner' drinks.
Knowing that B is a follower and a pleaser it would not surprise me if she is drinking again.
After much consternation I called her last night. I so dearly wanted to hear her voice. We have spoken only twice in the past month and I do not want her to get the idea that I am going to abandon her.
I know that she has already left. But she does things like buy me cowboy boots as a trip present and emails and txt messages me frequently. but beyond that she says that she is otherwise tired and busy.
She looks for things to occupy herself. B is like a butterfly who hops from plant to plant dropping her sweet nectar never realizing that she is landing on plants that will take whatever she will give and want more.
I am one of those people. I just can't get enough love from her. Thankfully I am growing and prayerfully the Lord will remove this from me and I will get this type of love from him.
Yet part of me is having a difficult time letting go of her and getting that need fulfilled rightly. And I worry that B will continue to travel around the vicious circles and never see the light.
I know that I can't conrtol that either, and I have no idea how to trust God and let go of my worries. B has been trough so much needless pain in her life, of her own making, and she just will not stop and turn to the Lord.

November 13, 2005
8:37 am
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Pleaser
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Dear Enoch

I would say that she is running away from you. You are sober, she maybe is just not ready. My situation is exactly the same but i am still with H.

Was she receptive of you on the telephone. Is today church day if so goodluck. You have a choice here, continue your recovery or go backwards to where B is at. I met my H thru Drink we drank alot together our 2 children were born thru drink. I love them dearly now. This spiritual road is frightening but also rewarding. I went to a wee meditation last night and broke down afterwards but it was good for me. Goodluck today pet. If B is hanging out with a drinker she is not in a safe place. You are in a safe place stay there please and I hope God guides you today.

Pleaser.

Also could you say a wee prayer for me thanks.

November 13, 2005
8:45 am
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Pleaser
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Also Enoch

I think she knows that you will not abandon her but do not abandon yourself in the process.

I hope today is good for you.

November 13, 2005
2:17 pm
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Enoch

Checked for you a few times today, your night is my day. I really hope Church has gone well. let me know.

I had a lovely day.

Godbless

Pleaser

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