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Please pray for my two oldest babies...
October 25, 2006
12:23 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Thanks thumkin, I appreciate it. You are wonderful. I am worried about them, but I am trying to trust in the prayers that are going up for them. Thanks again.

October 25, 2006
4:12 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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My daughter just got home from school and seems to be inpretty good spirits. It is hard to encourage her, when I am fearing the worst, but I am doing my best. Just please continue to pray for all of us as we face this bump in our road.

October 25, 2006
4:14 pm
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on my way
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You have my prayers too. 🙂

October 25, 2006
8:18 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am having issues with this tonight. Getting frustrated. I called and left a message at the neurosurgeons office today that did all of my daughters surgeries last year, because I want to know the significance of this issue. Just to get some answers somewhere, and naturally I have heard nothing. Please pray for my peace, because I have none tonight. The more that I think about this, the more nervous I get. This is my daughter, and I can't help but think about it. 49 nights in the hospital, 11 surgeries, multitudes of tests, developing of seizures, I am scared to death. I have spent 24 hours trying everyhting in my power to not fear the worst, but I can't help it.

October 25, 2006
8:33 pm
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ggfred4
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mich, what you are feeling is normal. Waiting is a horrible thing to the mind...I kept my cell on all day to hear some news on my results and nothing...So, I am thinking, no news is good news. Good old fashion denial!!! Think, you have been in those offices, with the piles of paperwork,insurance, patients, phones ringing, keeping on a schedule...Maybe they didn't think it was a priority emergency and will call you tomorrow...I don't know mich, but I just want to calm you...Gosh, it is so hard when it is your kid!!! I understand, love you girl!

October 26, 2006
8:04 am
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jastypes
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Prayers continuing, Mich. Waiting is sometimes the hardest part.

October 26, 2006
11:02 am
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am beginning to understand that Jas. These are my babies. I NEED someone to talk to me about this, and someone to tell me how worried I should be and stuff. I HATE this. It is making me crazy...and that is a short trip.

October 27, 2006
1:24 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Appointments are being set up for my oldest. The neurosurgeons office is highly concerned. Anyways, I tolf their pediatrician off yesterday. Pray for my attitude because it hasn't been good lately in regards to this situation.

Thanks

October 27, 2006
1:31 pm
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needtoheal
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(((((SCARED))))))

I am sending a huge hug to you

and I am thinking of you

and praying for you during this

most difficult time.....

with love, friendship & respect,

NEED

October 27, 2006
3:34 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Thanks Need, you're a peach....I appreciate you.

Mandy

October 27, 2006
3:51 pm
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justhinking
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Praying for you and your kids!!!!!!!!

October 27, 2006
4:19 pm
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readyforachange
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scared...my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your little ones.

Just a thought that entered my head, and you can kick me in the backside if I'm way out of line...

I know you've been struggling with many things lately, and I know how hard it has been for you. Maybe, just maybe, this bump in the road is a sign. A sign from you Higher Power that your babies need you, that you have a purpose here, and that you are a good and loving mom that he has entrusted with two of his most precious gifts. You are needed here to care for them, love them, guide them. Even when you feel inadequate, and lost, and desperate...they need you and he trusts you to do what needs to be done.

Just my thought on this...hope I didn't step over a line. (((scared)))

October 27, 2006
4:44 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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You didn't step over any lines Ready. Other than that one that has now caused me to cry. I want to take care of them REady. i do. I am just so insecure as to who I am as a person, a mother, and everything else. I am trying to get the help that I need. Please pray that it works. Their illnesses don't make me love them an ounce less, I just feel inadequate to take care of them. I just want to get the help that I need and enjoy what is left of their childhoods. They are GREAT kids. They are my life, and the ONLY reason that I am still here. Thanks for your thought. It is something for me to think about. I appreciate it.

October 27, 2006
7:04 pm
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Yes, Scared, as ready suggested....maybe we always have to ask ourselves what we are supposed to learn from the situation that has been given to us.

When there was a serious something to tell me, my physicians were calling me RIGHT NOW to tell me what they had learned. When they don't know, like gg says, they can't tell you anything yet. They have to accumulate more info. I will pray that there are good caring people who are paying attention and making their assessments as promptly as they can.

When my H had this excruciating back pain (a chip of bone had gotten lodged "between" vertebrae), I felt they took WAAAY too long to decide to remove it and relieve his pain. He was curled up in a foetal position on morphine for the last 2 weeks before surgery. I learned some time later that it often happens that the body can absorb something like this on its own. So even though the pain is very bad, the invasive surgery might be avoided if they hold off for a little while.

I know it is very hard to not panic, lose it, be angry, be suspicious, lose it......I will continue to pray for your precious children and your entire family's strength, esp. for you. For your ability to listen and hear what they say and then be able to have the right words to communicate with them and comfort your children. You can do this, Scared. Keep exhaling slowly to the count of ten when you feel out of control. Teeach your kids how and do it together. It really does work, especially when you feel....raw.

Keep writing stuff down as they tell you, so you can refer back and to keep from forgetting anything.

October 27, 2006
7:16 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Thanks Brynnie,

I am doing my best. It is just tough. I hate to see her struggle. And I HATE the idea of watching her suffer. I really do. I am tired of it.

October 28, 2006
10:28 pm
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readyforachange
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((((scared)))) My take on this again...for what it's worth:

They are great kids because of you. You have loved them, guided them, helped them...and shaped them into the wonderful people they are. And though you feel inadequate to deal with these difficult issues, you are dealing with it. You've sought the medical attention they need. You are looking for strength and answers here. You are looking to heal yourself so that you can be the best mom you can be. I will keep praying for you on your journey....

October 28, 2006
10:43 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Thanks ready

October 29, 2006
9:43 am
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readyforachange
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you are so very welcome, honey....I know what a difficult hand you have been dealt. Your strength and courage inspires me, as I have never had to deal with nearly as much as you have and many times find it hard to keep going.

October 30, 2006
9:03 am
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jastypes
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Keep us updated, Mich. Prayers continuing.

jill

October 30, 2006
9:28 am
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ScaredinMichigan
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Jill,

Thank you much. We have an appointment tomorrow with their pediatrician, my husband and I. We are fed up, and this needs to move and quick. Then we have an appointment on thursday with the opthamologist. That should give us a few more answers. We will see. Thank you much for your continued support and love. You are wonderful, and truly a blessing to me.

Mandy

October 30, 2006
9:30 am
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StronginHim77
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https://secure.healingrooms.co.....#038;l=us2

Dear Scared:

The above link lists over 6-7 locations of Intl. Healing Rooms in Michigan. If one of them is within reasonable driving distance, please take the children there. I have served as a volunteer prayer minister at one of the Healing Rooms here in Florida. They are wonderful places.

Anyone is welcome to drop in for prayer, regardless of your religious beliefs, affiliations, etc. Just tell them what you need prayer for and a team will sit down with you and pray for your needs. I have seen ASTONISHING things happen, as a result of those prayers. Even terminal cancer patients healed. I have seen this with my own eyes.

So, I would encourage you to check them out and get to one of them, if you can. Everyone prayed for at The Healing Rooms always leaves feeling great peace and relief. If nothing else, you could sure use a dose of peace.

Love,

Ma Strong

November 3, 2006
3:11 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Bumping this for kroika, but you'll have to go back to the first post...

November 3, 2006
3:15 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Basically as of right now, they have finally referred my five year old for a colonoscopy and an appointment with the GI specialist, so that is moving forward..

My daughter, they are now referring to Cleveland Clinic....They don't thikn her eyes are causing the headaches or blurred vision as we were told last week. They said she needs to see a neurosurgeon at Cleveland to look at the "big picture". They think the issues are coming from there being something wrong in with her head...I am so confused, and scared, and I just want this over with....I want someone to fix my baby...She is so tired of all of this...As are we.

Mich

November 3, 2006
3:33 pm
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Isis
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Hi lovey, been thinking of you today.

Seems like good news- things are set in a forward motion, things are getting done for your babes.

Try to calm down sweetie, take some deep breaths and try to relax. What we don't know scares us, it's a natural response to stress.

I don't know the whole story with your daughter, but there seems to be a long history of neurological problems- poor little thing. She's very lucky to have such a great mom to take care of her. You hear me girlfriend, you're A-#-1.

Things are getting done. Things will get better. Take care of you lovey too- at least give it a try.

Keeping you close,
Isis

November 3, 2006
3:40 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Isis-

Thank you SO much. I amjust so frustrated...In March of 05 she was diagnosed with a birth defect in the base of her skull, and we had the surgery to fix it and there has been a total of 11 brain surgeries all together. All between May 12th and Oct. 14th of last year. And to think that it might start up again....I am running on empty. Physically and mst definitely emotionally. Somewhere in there I had a baby 3 months ago, to total 4 children and a schildhood of SHIT to deal with. I am just too tired.

Thanks though for listening..

Mich

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