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2:33 am
September 29, 2010
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I am having a really hard time tonight and really want to cut right now is anyone awake????
2:36 am
September 27, 2010
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I am up. How are you dong?
2:39 am
September 29, 2010
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To say that Im ok would be a lie but I have not cut.
2:52 am
September 27, 2010
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want to talk? Or did you just want to know someone is here and cares?
2:55 am
September 29, 2010
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Just had a flashback and its always hard for me when I have a flashback. I will get over it its just hard.
2:59 am
September 27, 2010
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Sometimes I have to remind myself just breath in and breath out. If you have gotten through this before you have absolute proof you can get through it.
Did you just get up or did you not go to bed yet?
3:00 am
September 29, 2010
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I havent gone to bed yet
3:01 am
September 27, 2010
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Yeah me either. My family calls me nuts! You got plans for tomorrow, well today?
3:03 am
September 29, 2010
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I go to church in the morning I have a class to teach. the kids are going to get me up in 6 hours and Im not looking forward to that it is so much easier to sleep in the day than it is at night
3:08 am
September 27, 2010
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I sleep much better during the day also. When is the world going to figure that out?
Friday I didn't go to bed until 6:45 am. and so when I had to get up for work, I thought about how tired I was and about how miserable I was going to feel all day and I said screw it, I can have a good day even if I am tired. I cranked the radio and didn't let things bug me. I ended up having a fun day.
3:12 am
September 29, 2010
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I do hope to have a good day tomorrow I did have a friend cancel dinner on me though Iw as really looking forward to it to cause I havent seen her in 5 years but she does want to reschedule. I need to try and go to bed. Or Im going to be a grumpy mommy tomorrow.
3:12 am
September 29, 2010
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ty for being here.
3:14 am
September 27, 2010
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Hope you have a good day tomorrow. Pleas take care of yourself.
3:16 am
September 29, 2010
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I will try.
7:05 am
September 24, 2010
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hi random, how are you feeling today? sorry i would have loved to be there for you, because sometimes i feel the same way, and say pls someone pls be awake and talk to me.. but because of my time zone, i find no one.... i know the feeling so much... wish i could be there for you next time.
11:52 am
September 27, 2010
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(((RW))) hope you are well, honey.
1:06 pm
September 27, 2010
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Randomwoman2 hope you are feeling more like yourself today.
Here is a part of a song that I like, maybe you might like it also.
God will make a way where there seems to be no way.
He works in ways we cannot see.
He will be my guide, hold me closely to his side with love and strength for each new day, he will make a way. He will make a way.
12:45 am
September 29, 2010
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I am doing a lot better tonight thank you
10:17 am
September 30, 2010
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Dear RW -
Do you think that the disappointment of your friend having to cancel (and reschedule) your much anticipated get together triggered you? Made you feel rejected or as if she didn't REALLY want to see you?
Talking about this may help you understand and overcome the triggers better...
-- Ma Strong
10:31 am
September 29, 2010
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It added to it greatly but I started feeling like it wasn't going to be a good night a few hours before I got her email and the email the feeling of rejection is the final straw I guess.
10:57 am
September 30, 2010
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A root of rejection can wreak havoc in our lives, our choices and our reactions to perfectly normal or harmless situations. You had begun anticipating disappointment, before the actual disappointment (her email) landed. I think you have been so hurt and let down by people in your life that you EXPECT it to steal your joy at every possible turn in the road.
No wonder you felt "triggered" to cut again. But I am hoping that you were able to comfort and talk yourself through the temptation to injure yourself. You have great value...great worth...and you can overcome this root of rejection. So many people care about you. You ARE going to beat it and be free.
Hugs to you,
Ma Strong
11:02 am
September 29, 2010
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Maybe I did anticipate it I hadnt even thought about that. I did not cut I found my dear friend kari online and talked to her until the wee hours. I told her about my cutting the same day I said that I wasnt going to do it any more.
11:06 am
September 29, 2010
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Which was the 13th of last month
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