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PLEASE HELP: I have a problem & don't know how to solve????
December 27, 2005
12:48 am
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Lostrose
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September 29, 2010
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My ex & I had a talk last week on Tuesday & he said isn't it best we be friends & that we couldn't have a relationship with him being in another town and he didn't want a relationship with me the way I was or the way he was (drug addict & now staying clean). He's at his folks since Thanksgiving & will be returning sometime after the holidays.

On Christmas day I decided I wasn't going to call/text & I would wait to see if he did. Of course he didn't, which wasn't a huge surprise. Around 9:30pm I texted him saying, "I had a wonderful Christmas. All of my friends & family wished me a Merry Christmas. Everyone except for you. If you cared you would have moved heaven and earth to get a hold of me. For whatever reason you choose not to. Christmas is the time of year for family/friends. You showed me i'm in neither category. I may have issues, which I'm working on, though overall I'm a good person who deserves to be around people who care about me. You wanted closure and to start a new life. Your actions succeeded in pushing me away and getting what you wanted. I hope this makes you hapy and I wish you the best."

Here's my HUGE problem. His car which is broke down is in my garage and he still has some other stuff in the garage. He still owes me $1400.00. When he was paranoid he put some screws in some of the door frames & now I have holes & he wants to fix them. Also, he will probably call me to pick him up when he gets back to town to come over & pick up his stuff. I want to be his friend, but I'm afraid I can't deal with it. I don't know how to handle the situation or what is the best way. Furthermore, I want to move on & start dating again. But I don't know how I should deal with him if he was to find out. I just don't know what I should or shouldn't do. Please HELP ME..............

December 27, 2005
3:04 am
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Lass
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Lostrose,

My advice would be to take your losses and run with them. Having spent tens of thousands in court antics divorcing the father of our son, I would say that $1,500., some stuff, and some screw holes is minor losses. The letter was great. I would consider it done. Pack his stuff in boxes, put it out on the porch, and change the locks. Slap your hands together a couple times, bang the dust off your shoes and go wash your hair. Call it a day.

LL

December 27, 2005
4:58 pm
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balancesekr
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September 27, 2010
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lostrose,

I don't know the whole situation, but from what I have read...

Sounds like detachment and letting go is the best thing to do here. Start taking care of yourself and surrounding yourself with people who do care about you.

When he gets back into town, try not to pick him up. Try to find something for you to do besides being around for him.

Regarding the money, just think of it this way, it cost you 1,400 to get him out of your life.

If you are meant to be together, you will be in the future, but for right now, it sounds like you both have things to work on.
good luck.

December 27, 2005
5:29 pm
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goodenough
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I could not be quiet. I'll be short: the book is called "women who love too much" by Robin Norwood. It is excellent read. It changed my life. And I was not very dysfunctional. I am in the field myself and I found the book just excellent. You may find many answers there. If u don't read again.

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