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Past influence present???
December 25, 2003
4:40 am
New Member
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
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Hi, a lay person here, caught in relationship problem. Childish, right?
I'm a happy guy, i thought, before i started my present relationship with a girl 6 months ago. However, i don know what is going on in my mind..i can't trust her. We all knew that, trust is the basic of a relationship. I failed to do that and i know i'm step on the ways to a miserable outcome.
After a long periods of self interpretation, i suspect that this may be due to my past experience. Because my ex girlfriend had betrayed me and be together with my best buddy. But i did not angry with her, and we had been stick back to each other after few years later. I know i had forgive her.
While, my present girlfriend had told me a lie when we just started our relationship few days later. I'm extremely angry. But i still forgive her and continue the relationship. And, i try to appreciating all the time we spend together.
Another things... my present girlfriend is a singlemother, I know this when the day we started the relationship. I struggled for a month to accept the truth.
Her ex-boyfriend left her when she decided to keep the baby. While, they still keep contact, and his ex-boyfriend is in the same college with me. My girlfriend also study in the same college with me but she is my junior in counsling course.
I'm 21 years old now, and my girlfriend is 20 years old. Can guess my age when reading my sharing?
.... feel a bit release when sharing here, cause it is quite heavy burden for me.

December 26, 2003
2:01 pm
New Member
Forum Posts: 1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
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Hi James,

Forgive me as I' confused - but what else is new?

What exactly is your problem? Just trusting her? Are you not getting along?


December 27, 2003
12:11 pm
Forum Posts: 433
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
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Trust takes time to develop in any relationship. You have a very valid reason to be a bit shy from trusting a woman. What your past girlfriend and best buddy did to you was horrible. It was a cruel thing to do to any human being let alone a boyfriend and best friend.

It will take time to trust again, but that doesn't mean you don't date. Of course you date. And you have a great time and enjoy the relationship. A healthy partner will understand your fears, accept them, and offer reassurance.


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