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February 24, 2004
2:59 am
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lulujazz
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September 30, 2010
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hi everyone. after reading some of the threads here, i've decided to right one of my own to get some things out of my head and to seek advice. so here goes:

i was in this cyclical relationship with this guy. our first 2 dates was great but after sensing him moving too fast, i broke it off. however things picked up again shortly after, except this time it was all physical. we got into the physical relationship off and on and during the summer before i left oversees, we spent a lot of time together. the last 2 months before i left, we were together but mainly physically. however, we grew attached to each other. we went on a 'break' while i was gone for four months but kept in touch.

when i returned, i told him i only wanted to be friends because i felt that i couldn't be attached yet. he wanted a relationship but settled for the friendship. so we attempted being friends, but then ended up in bed again. talked again. and stayed friends. this was going fine and i was dating again. however, after hanging out a few times more he told me he thinks he loves me and wanted to be with me. i missed him and we did have a great connection so we spent time with each other again.

we were so comfortable with each other especially in bed, even when it wasn't sexual. it felt really good to hold each other and talk about our goals and fears. we talked a lot about our feelings and whenever i was with him, it felt right. i did start falling for him but a part of me was still afraid so i pushed it back. about a week after he told me he loved me, we talked once again and this time he said he didn't feel it anymore.

he's been going in circles on his feelings for me and i guess i've been doing the same too. i felt that we both love each other but are too afraid to let go. he didn't want to hurt me again and said this time we had to try to not see each other anymore. i agreed since we were both so opposite.

since then, which was only 3 days ago, i still miss him a lot and felt really hurt by what he did. i'm starting to feel now that i loved him and keep feeling that if i'd let him know that, then perhaps we could have worked it out. i was holding myself back while we were together.

it felt good to be with him and he said he felt the same way too. could it had work if i had told him i loved him?

February 24, 2004
6:24 pm
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Molly
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When will people learn that love truly takes time, and still is not a perfect solution to relations ? Sex always clouds every thing, it feels good... that is why it"should " come later, rather than sooner in a potential relationship. Maybe if you said you loved him he would still be around, but do you love him, what do you know of him, what would you really do for this relationship, or he for you, do you really know what love is, or just lust, desire, wanting... ????

February 25, 2004
12:54 pm
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marley
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Molly
I am trying to answer exactly those questions. HOW DO YOU KNOW? It is love or something that your ego craves or that you are trying to prove to yourself/yourfriends/the world? Any answers?

February 25, 2004
1:00 pm
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nancee
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Lulu, what do you mean when you say that you were opposites?

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