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out of control worrier!
February 6, 2000
11:53 pm
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Alli
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September 30, 2010
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Hi!
I posted a few months back and everyone was helpful so Im back again for more advice!
To look at me, you see a person who seems very calm and worry free. However, on the inside I feel out of control with my thoughts and worries.

I think it all started almost a year ago with a miscarriage late in my pregnancy. It was devastating in every way, but I made it through.Ever since then, I worry all the time about everything. I cant stop worrying about my husband, my daughter, my parents etc. Its awful! I dont have panic attacks or physical symptoms though.

And I was sexually abused by a relative when I was about seven. I thought I had pushed that memory away years ago. However, for months now I dwell on it over and over.
I cant tell anyone about any of this. I feel embarrassed. The silly thing is that my husband would be supportive if I told him but I just cant.

February 7, 2000
4:50 am
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hazza
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September 24, 2010
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HI alli,
I too am a worrier!! It sounds like the shock and hurt of your miscarriage has brought about the symptoms of anxiety disorder.
Usually we find that we have been a bit this way all our lives but at times of stress this is the way our body handles stress, by worrying and trying to control things we could never control.

It is natural that your mind is now re-playing all the things that have hurt you in your life, i too have things that go over and over in my mind. It seems to be worse if you are very tired or more stressed than usual.

The good thing is that you have caught it early! before it has time to take a hold of you any more than it has. If you can find a doctor or therapist who has experience of anxiety and anxiety disorders then they are the next step. Also read up on anxiety, it is a classic symptom of anxiety disorder to worry about the safety of your family to a greater than "normal" amount. The constant worrier exhausts you so you are more tired and even more prone to the worrying.
A good author to read is Dr Claire Weekes, try to find her book, self-help for your nerves, it has helped so many people that i know. and please make time to relax, and tell yourself when your thoughts start racing that it is only anxiety making you fear the worst, you have had one great loss with your pregnancy and it is natural to fear that you will lose other people that you love,but the anxiety makes you obsessed with these worrys to the point that it interferes with your life and makes you unhappy. Read up as much as you can on anxiety, it will really help. Take it easy on yourself, your brain, mind and soul are just tired and and a little scared. and telling you to relax,

Once you have relaxed a little, and you must try to do that first, you can regain a little strenghth and decide what you want to do about the abuse issues. If you feel that your husband will be supportive then tell him, it will be a weight of your mind that there are no secrets between you, or you could get some councelling so that you could discuss it with someone neutral away from your home life. But please take care of your anxiety too, i know alot of it needs time to cope with. but everyday at the moment take some time to relax, tell yourself that in the course of time you will find answers to deal with all the issues in your life but you also deserve some peace every day so that you are at your best to cope with the issues in your life. You are still grieving your loss, give yourself time, once your regain your emotional strenghth you will be able to deal with any of these issues in a healthy, practical way, and the bully of anxiety will not keep cornering you making you despair.
Hugs and peace
Hazza

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