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OMG counceller comes tomorrow...HELP
September 25, 2006
1:58 pm
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mumubaby89
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Oh how I loathe counseling.....so far I've been in counseling for a few months and I'm its my first time. I'd have to say that 'therapy' has been one of the worst experiences of my life, honestly. counseling has HELPED me, though I would never admit it to my counselor's face. At first, counseling was 'demon spawn' because i was so stubborn about my frame of mind. According to her, i was looking at the world all wrong...ouch...that really offended me and I refused to tell her anything. I was taking the things she said too personal and i believed that she was actually criticizing me.

I dread going to counseling every week and i almost came out in tears every time. i am not getting better, and if anything, I wam getting more depressed.i havnt been for about 6/7 weeks....due to hoilddays and i dont have the guts to go. Im too nervous about tomorrow....should i go??If i go what i say??

My life has been changing alot...from falling out with parents...being homeless ..running away...cutting myself...this has happened during the ho,s mainly...so what i say?? everything??

mumubaby89

September 25, 2006
2:10 pm
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mumubaby89
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pleasee help

September 25, 2006
2:12 pm
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southgoingzax
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mumu,

counseling can be uncomfortable because we have to take a long hard look at who we are, the decisions we've made, etc. Sometimes it is really hard to like what you see, right? And you feel worse because you have to face all of this nastiness about yourself - but in order to get better and feel better, you have to start to process all of the unpleasant emotions. It will be hard, but it WILL help. Go with an open mind, be willing to listen to advice...you are doing this because you are a brave young woman who wants to improve her life. You can do this.

September 25, 2006
2:17 pm
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CAMER
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counseling is so good....I used to be ashamed to tell the counselor things that i have done in my life, but trust me, they have heard everything....opening up is so good, it takes alot of tension and closed in feelings to be released and its oooh so good to have someone listen and just give good advice. Keep going it is so worth it.

September 26, 2006
1:56 pm
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mumubaby89
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*cries*
I chickened out again... so that means she wont be in untill next week. I emailed her back sayin i couldnt go due to work load,...when really i dont have any to do. She paid by the college to come in for students who need help with things. She will not be in untill next week

=(... what do i do. Just go and tell her that i have been scared to come...which probs wont go down well

I am unbelieveable nackerd from college, life and work. I am skint and yet needs to be paid is my re-sits..which money is due next week and i get paid hardly any money what so ever... i need moere work

I need to get a grip really...my life is going down the drain and i am not doign a bloody thing about it.

September 26, 2006
3:20 pm
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doubleloss
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mumu, i find counselling such a relief, it's hard to just be open and vulnerable so make sure you are comfortable with your counsellor, it's importatn to work with someone that challenges you otherwise it is a waste of time, but more important, you must feel safe (and don't have to confess that to him/her).
Be brave, life is so short to be miserable. You are here and there are people that do care about you. So, don't stop now, and next week, pray that you'll have the courage to go to your session. As zax says, keep an open mind, remember that there is nobody more deaf that the one that doesn't want to listen. But I know listening some times is SO hard, sometimes we are just not ready, but if you keep at it, it will happen. Take care

September 26, 2006
3:22 pm
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lovinglife
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Mumu~ I don't know...could you find another counselor???

Yes, talking about our issues, bringing things up from the past etc, etc. can be very painful as well as when we have *issues* we can take things said to us the wrong way (I've done that) but I would think that going into counseling you should start to feel better about yourself, not worse. I don't know... but dreading the thought of going and having it be a source of stress for you – something is not right with that picture. I wonder if maybe you just didn't make a connection to the counselor- like perhaps you didn't feel validated... don't know.

If you are unable to get another counselor or the reasons why you are dreading going is because of talking about things then most definitely..." Just go and tell her that i have been scared to come..." and then tell her why you've been scared.

September 26, 2006
3:23 pm
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atalose
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Is it possible to attend a group therapy in your area. My friends daughter didn't fair well with a one on one counselor, she also felt uncomfortable with the counselor and was unable to open up. She stopped going and we found a group which she was hesitant at first but ended up really enjoying it and found she had alot in common with the others.
Just a suggestion of something you might want to look into you.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

October 1, 2006
7:16 am
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mumubaby89
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Hi

I go to college and the counceller comes once a week for students...and i happen to be one. Its free and easy to get to so i go as my tutor appiont i should try it. Ihave been going for about 3 months and the last 7 weeks i havent gone because ive ben sacred. She does ask lots of questions and says 'why' all the time ..when most of the time i dont actually know myself. I dunno its hard to talk to her and she believes i need to work on my communication.

I have felt sacred and well a sense of guilt for some reason. i know its not her fault but its thw whole idea of seeing a coucneller.

I have alot on my mind too at the mintue and to make matters worse i have just fell out with me best mate =[

October 1, 2006
10:19 am
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cammyjo
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Hi mumubaby

I'm kind of struggling finding the words to say here, I too have a hard time with my communication. My therapist would also ask me questions that I would respond
"I dunno" to, and she would of course say, "yes you do know" and I would find it difficult to say because to hear the truth about myself from her or me, or anyone else for that matter hurt.

October 1, 2006
10:26 am
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risingfromtheashes
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mumu,

what about going home and thinking about her questions - and putting your thoughts down in a journal - then sharing the journal with her.

sometimes it IS hard to think "under pressure" - but later on, you have those answers. I know when I go to my support group - I ALWAYS think of things I wanted to share AFTER I leave.

Perhaps you need to spend a little time each day thinking about the questions she is asking - and even if you can't answer them to her, you can answer them to yourself. Sometimes the hardest part is being honest with ourselves. Once you can be honest with yourself, then you can work on being honest with other people.

I am not saying you are a DISHONEST person, I am just saying that sometimes we don't like hearing the truth, so we ignore it, hoping it will go away. That's called "stuffing" and often when we "stuff" those feelings and such, we hurt inside because of it.

If you are not much of a writer, perhaps drawing? draw pictures that tell a story and share those pictures and tell your therapist what those pictures represent. Sometimes a therapist can tell alot from a picture.

October 1, 2006
1:10 pm
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Oh Mumubaby!

It sounds like you are experiencing growing pains. You are birthing a new life for yourself and yes it can be painful, yet look at the rewards.

I looked for a counselor for over two years before I found someone I could really work with. I have moved ahead and become a little more positive too, and able to problem solve better. I don't get as stuck as I used to.

And start today, right now by being loving toward youself. Ask yourself what would it look like to live a good life and then make it happen. A teacher taught me "If its meant to be, then it's up to me" As Luke Pepard says, "Make it so # One"

October 2, 2006
3:02 pm
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mumubaby89
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=[

fmaily, college,friends, work and life is hell...i mean i dont have lots of mates..felll out with my best ever mate and my family(well some)

Today as been bad...counceller comes tomorrow and i have no choice but to attend =[

October 11, 2006
1:16 pm
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mumubaby89
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cheers ..... =[

October 11, 2006
1:27 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Hi

Haven't seen you in awhile. Maybe just missing each other. Either way, glad to see you.

I am sure you will do just fine w/ your counselor. Be honest and tell him/her everything. If you don't spill then they cannot help you.

Have a cup of tea and try to not worry. You wil be just fine.

October 11, 2006
3:16 pm
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mumubaby89
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...its been about 4 months since i last went i dont know what to do no more...

October 11, 2006
4:42 pm
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mamacinnamon
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mUmU:

You go in and you just as you did before. You sit down and you talk. You tell the counselor what is goin on, how you feel. You and he/she discuss what you can do about it....

I'm sure once the appointment is over you'll be sayin "Now that wasn't so bad".

October 12, 2006
1:48 pm
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mumubaby89
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i supposee...

October 12, 2006
4:51 pm
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mamacinnamon
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How did it go w/ the counselor?

Everything go ok?

October 15, 2006
3:56 pm
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mumubaby89
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i chickend out again =[

October 15, 2006
4:07 pm
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smarterone
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I wish i could afford one, pouring out my feelings and esp to someone not involved in your life is so healthy. Try again.

October 26, 2006
7:53 am
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mumubaby89
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it is free for me as i am at college and its part of the college serivce...to offer students between 16-21 ...help

November 3, 2006
2:51 pm
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mumubaby89
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to be honest why dont have the gutts to go..i mean shes jsut a human and ive managed to go ... maybes its too late i mean..ive been through loads lately... running away, family fights, new member to fmaily... moving out... university picking and well college work...Its just really too much ..

anybody ....can you help?

May 14, 2007
3:16 pm
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mumubaby89
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Its been about 7months and i still havnt been

I had a row with my college tutor the other day!,

I am sorry i havnt been on here..but doesnt seem like its mattered as no1 replys to me anymore

May 14, 2007
5:27 pm
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StronginHim77
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I haven't seen any postings from you in quite awhile. Please fill us in on how you are doing? The more you feel able to share, the better able we are to contribute.

- Ma

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