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Neshie's Night- Wed
September 7, 2005
10:59 pm
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Neshema
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Okay, night people, come on in.

September 7, 2005
11:00 pm
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22haha
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Nesh - I almost started this post for you - 2 hours ago. I have been waiting for ya. Hows mom tonight? How are you? I am so happy tonight!!!!

September 7, 2005
11:03 pm
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hey nesh, i have been waiting for you to sign in too!!

September 7, 2005
11:09 pm
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22-why so happy? whats up...

nesh-hope your arthritis is doing ok
how is it going with your friend?

September 7, 2005
11:12 pm
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22haha
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I am happy because I feel like I have a new found strength in myself. I stood up to my bf/exbf and he is starting to realize that I am not going to take anymore abuse from him. I just feel good about myself tonight for the first time in a long time. I feel like me again, happy, healthy (almost) confident. He drained the germy hottub too (in case you know Neshs joke).

Hw are you L&F?

September 7, 2005
11:15 pm
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Awww, hiya support group! My mom is terrible. Thanks for asking. My arthritis...well, I was walking on the side of my bad foot until my good foot flared up. I am late, cuz I taught tonight...had a good class. Got asked to consider a position at another univ. Got asked to consider being editor of a journal. Have not heard from my guy. He is going out of town early in the morning. Was gonna call him and tell him about the other job possibility to see his reaction, but I have refrained. Got good feedback about my promotion stuff. How are all of you?

September 7, 2005
11:16 pm
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doing good. just read the thread with you all talking about the hot-tub. nesh busted me up. i am glad you feel better. you can do it!!!!

September 7, 2005
11:18 pm
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22haha
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Nesh - gosh sorry to hear about you arthritis and your mom. I guess on a good note - that is wonderful news about your job offer. You must be very good at what you do. Don't worry about your man calling.. I'm sure he will if he is going out of town.

September 7, 2005
11:18 pm
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Neshema
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I am worried about that Hollow guy in the other post. He sounds WAY down.

September 7, 2005
11:23 pm
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Neshema
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22- he called last nite to say bye already and may call while he is gone for 2 days. I am not worried. Okay, go read my post to you about the hot tub.

September 7, 2005
11:30 pm
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22haha
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So, what are you going to do with this job offer? Any ideas?

On a totally different topic: can anyone tell me why my appt. is so quiet until I get in the shower and then it always seems like something loud happens. I took a shower a bit ago and a suitcase fell down in my closet and I freaked out. Why only when I am in the shower????

September 7, 2005
11:36 pm
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Neshema
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No idea about the job.

September 7, 2005
11:36 pm
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neshema-remember when we were talking about having friends? someone pointed out to me that my husband has alot of drinking buddies. they asked me to name one friend he has that no matter what they do, drinking isn't priority number one. (nobody) on the other hand i have a few close friends i have had for twenty years. i can always call them if i need them. i reckon i was having a pity party the other night-sorry

are you considering taking either job offer?

September 7, 2005
11:38 pm
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22-i bet you are just listening harder when you are in the shower.

September 7, 2005
11:39 pm
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Neshema
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wait, my guy left town this morning, not tomrw. he called last night to say goodbye. I am such an absent minded professor. Today is Wed right?

September 7, 2005
11:44 pm
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nesh-what does your guy do for a living that he goes out of town so much? it will be wednesday night for about 18 more minutes.

September 7, 2005
11:44 pm
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22haha
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L&F - you are probably right. I guess I get worried about being alone sometimes.

Nesh - today is Wed. I guess that just means he will return home that much sooner. Sometimes it pays to be abscent minded!!

September 7, 2005
11:55 pm
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Good evn Nesh, 22, L&F:

Glad to see ya'll.

September 7, 2005
11:55 pm
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have either of you had experience with getting and setting boundries?
the point is, i am doing so well lately that it is so calm, that sometimes i feel the need to mess it up. believe me i resist the urge. everything is on an even keel and i am not used to it. (want to keep it though). sometimes it is nerve wracking. i have lived in flight or fight so long, that i feel like i am having withdrawls now.

September 7, 2005
11:57 pm
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hey mamma-how r u? i read the threads at night---i love your answer about the mouse(feed it to the cat) that's hilarious!!!!

September 7, 2005
11:57 pm
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Neshema
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he is a professor, like I am...

September 8, 2005
12:00 am
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22haha
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L&F - don't rock the boat!! If things area calm enjoy it. Would give my left arm to get rid of the insanity I had been living. I know what you mean - you are so used to the turbulance that it feels like something is miising. You are doing great - I wouldn't do anything but relax and take it day by day.

Good evening mama.

September 8, 2005
12:07 am
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L&F:

Let things calm down and keep them down. The flight & fright mechanism is in the basal ganglia section of the brain. IF it is active for long periods of time then you could eventually develop post traumatic stress. I did. Always watchin my back, always afraid, always on alert, no sleep coz I might awake to a hand around my throat. Nasty stuff we won't get into. The point is that folks w/ long term stress that are always in the f&f mode can develope ptsd which will lead to other nasty illnesses. Yes, it is withdrawal, just like any other addiction but you will get thru it.
Once thru the withdrawal stage do not ever get yourself in the same position. If you are nervous turn on the radio for noise, or the tv. 🙂

September 8, 2005
12:09 am
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22-dont get me wrong. it aint perfect. i live with an active alchoholic. i just have detatched to the point of sanity. he doesn't affect me like he use to. i noticed how well my kids are doing to. they are following my lead.

September 8, 2005
12:17 am
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L&F- oh, o.k. It's easier to write when you have more info. No, I have never gone through withdral. I am sorry to hear you are living with an active alcoholic? Is their no way to get him to AA? How do you interact with each other? I wish I had some good words of advise for you but I am afraid I don't other that I hope you know that you are leading a good example for your kids now and that is extremely important.

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