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Need to Find Myself
September 13, 1999
1:56 pm
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needhelp
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September 29, 2010
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I am 27 years old. I've been dating someone for 4 years who I love dearly. We are talking about marriage. I have an overbearing mother who does not treat me as an adult. I become very quite around her and do not voice my opinion. She says disrepectful things to my boyfriend and my boyfrind complains. He says things to my mother and my mother complains. I stuck because I don't know how to handle this situation. I was taught to respect your elders and don't talk back. I seem to be stuck there.

My mother wants to know everything I am doing. My parents pay for my house and they paid for my car but then turned the payments over to me so the car is still in my fathers name. I fell short on some payments which my father helped my out. My mother now holds that in my face and tells my I am not grown. I tell her I am an adult and she does not have to police me but she feels an adult is some one who can pay there bills. I am afraid of her. She does not approve and I will try to do things for her approval or get angry when she critcizes something I decided to do.

My boyfriend always speaks of childern and does not want my mother around the children if she is going to ridicule him. He also says its my fault that she does this because I refuse to say anything to her.

I need help.

September 13, 1999
4:56 pm
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Anonymous
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September 24, 2010
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You are acting like a child, how can you expect to be treated as an adult? I dont want to offend, I am only pointing out what is obvious to eveyone but yourself.
Create financial and emotional independence for yourself and your boyfriend will respect you for it as well as your parents. YOu will then be happy and able to draw boundaries around your relationship with your partner where your parents are concerned and they will take your seriously.

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