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Need Some Insight....
March 16, 2007
12:49 am
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Sept
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September 24, 2010
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I have recently learned that my husband is a Co-Dependent. I think I too have some of these tendencies, but likely most of us do. Although its always easier to "see" someone elses weaknesses 🙂 Anyway, I'm devastated, we're getting a divorice, 25 years. I wished it wouldn't be this way and wanted to be hopeful. It's simply dysfunctional, and not okay like it is without some real help. I will not stay without mutual effort. He is not good with his feelings and that makes me frustrated and resentful. He is responsible for his own choices and I simply can't believe he would rather do nothing and stay as is than to DO something about it. He's so dishonest with himself and knows our relationship my gosh it's almost the same street and same potholes. He deals with things in passive aggressive mannerisms. That's tough- and challenging doesn't make decisions well at all and prefers to blame everyone else. I introduced counseling - he wants me to get "fixed". Although we went for a little while - he stopped, said it was financial. I said it just too intimate for him. I still went and learned about this co-dependency thing. Ultimately, we're both responsible and both can benefit. But, he's not willing. It's over. Unfortunately being intimate with his feelings is way more effort that he cares to go. It makes me sad he's so closed - really he is so dishonest with himself and would rather stay in this "icky" lifestyle than to DO something about it.... basically, I'm venting... it's just sad.

March 16, 2007
6:19 am
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ggfred4
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September 30, 2010
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Sept, just reading this made me shiver. This was very close to describing my husband of 27 years. I am not sure if he is codependent, never thought of it. This statement, " prefers to blame everyone else", is too familiar to me. I am struggling here with our relationship now. Just realized what I typed, so true, I with our...hmmm.

Thank you for venting, because through your venting, you have helped me.

gg

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