Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
need some advise please...
June 24, 2009
10:51 pm
Avatar
wireless28806
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 13
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

When you first meet somebody, and they tell you they love you after the third time you see them and they will do anythingfor you...
as time goes by and you spend a lot of time with them and they start to get verbally abusive, then emotionally abusive
theytell you they hate you they wish you would die.
they sew your shirt the next day, and tell you they love you.
The next day.. they accuse you of wanting to sleep with your friend, and other crazy shit.
The next morning you get the email.. I love you so much.

For the next month they are distant..
for the next month they love you like they did when they first met you. Will not let go of you..
Is it crazyness, or somebody that has past issues and doesnt want to accept it? Will it alqayabe like this?

Thank You

June 24, 2009
11:21 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi. What you are describing is called the push/pull effect. With one hand the person is telling you to come closer with the other they are pushing you away. It causes nothing but crazy making. A person who is on drugs, alcohol or mentally ill often behaves this way. When a realtionship has reached that point it wont just repair itself on its own. Usually takes a serious intervention. As in both need to go to couples counseling. Or someone needs to walk away and get help to find out what it is about them that would put up with a mentally unstable, unpredictable, emotionally abusive person. There usually is no upside to these situations except for the fact that when they end hopefully someone learns their lesson and doesnt ever get involved with someone like that again.

June 24, 2009
11:44 pm
Avatar
It No Longer Matters
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 72
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

It is push pull and it is a form of emotional abuse

Bitsy

June 25, 2009
9:04 am
Avatar
atalose
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 18
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

To answer your question, will it always be like this? Yes it will until like Destinystar said some kind of intervention happens via counseling, therapy of some kind.

Lessons learned, if someone is telling you they love you and will do anything for you after only 3 dates, that’s a huge red flag to let you know there are some emotional issues with that person.

Those kind of emotional issues tend to progress especially if that person feels you are pulling away from them or want to end the relationship.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

June 25, 2009
9:07 am
Avatar
CAMER
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 100
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

question is....do you think you deserve this treatment? i didn't think so....and are you ready to walk away??? cuz basically this person is who he is and change can only come from within himself.

June 25, 2009
10:14 am
Avatar
Lanigirl
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 161
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

You have it all in front of you. A person told you they loved you after the third time they met with you? I'm sure you're a great person but love takes time.

Yes, it will always be like that. Speaking from personal experience, the push/pull that was mentioned will always be there because the person gets a high off of it = power and it ends up making you crazy.

June 26, 2009
11:13 pm
Avatar
wireless28806
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 13
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
June 26, 2009
11:46 pm
Avatar
fantas
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 14
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

The only way to predict how one is going to behave in the future is look at their past. Unfortunately, the answer to this question is yes, but only if you tolerate and accept being treated like that. You teach people how to treat you. If I were in your shoes, I would leave and let him be. I do not do very well with the now on now off temperament. So he'd call one day to find my phone disconnected and my locks changed, The End :).

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 247
Currently Online:
32
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110935
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38542
Posts: 714222
Newest Members:
jessicawales, documentsonline, SafeWork, thomasalina, genericsmartdrugs, 才艺
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2019 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer