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Need prayers for a dear friend...
October 22, 2006
3:34 pm
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readyforachange
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A friend of mine has been battling breast cancer for almost 2 years. She is the most caring, energetic, loving mom I know. She has three children 18, 16 and 12.

Our kids have played on the same sports teams for years, and she's always there on the sidelines, cheering them on. She's always the one bringing things for all the kids on the team. We have so missed her joy and spirit on the sidelines this season...

She has just been put in the hospital, and it doesn't look good. She is on IV morphine, and it is terrible pain. Please keep this dear woman in your prayers, and pray that she is free from pain and can spend as much time with her children as possible in her final days.

October 22, 2006
5:57 pm
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This is so sad, ready. Her children are too young. I will remember them all and you in my prayers.

October 22, 2006
6:55 pm
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readyforachange
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Thank you, Brynnie...it is so ironic that it is Breast Cancer Awareness month. Her 12 year old daughter has a birthday coming up, too...I just don't even know what to do for her except pray. We've been sending meals to the family once a week, but I don't know what else to do for them. Counting on the power of prayer...

October 22, 2006
7:26 pm
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cyndra820
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Ready,

I will include your friend and her family in my prayers. I will tell my prayer circle about her as well.

Your doing all you can do for them. They know that you care and that they aren't alone in this. Beyond that there isn't much you can do.

Regards,
Cyndra

October 22, 2006
7:33 pm
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Rasputin
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RFC -

My oldest sister had breast cancer last fall and she went ahead with the chemo, operation & even removed her ovaries to prevent the cancer from spreading to other areas. She is only 46 years and has daughter 19 years old and my sister is still alive.

Do breast cancer patients live or die? My sister is still alive!

I will keep you and your dear friend and her family in my prayers.

(((RFC)))

October 22, 2006
10:57 pm
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Randomwomen2
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You are all in my thoughts and prayers durring this difficult time.

October 23, 2006
10:02 am
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readyforachange
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Thank you all for your prayers. It means so much to me to know that she will be lifted up in prayer. It is about all I can do right now...

October 23, 2006
10:14 am
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I am getting close to the 5 yr mark since I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I had a lumpectomy, radiation and chemo. So I guess I am a survivor so far.

October 23, 2006
10:45 am
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Excuse me, I accidentally sent too soon.

Each person's cancer is different. Locations, stages....the treatment is tailored from the medical profession's best statistics.

I went to the best breast care clinic possible. I had faith in the people who treated me and still do. I was overwhelmed at first, and did not deal well, because it was something beyond my control. Even today, I know the chance it will show up again some time in the future is a reality.

So there is an understandable fear and uncertainty and helplessness.

I believe in the power of prayer and miracles and also that you have to accept this part of life along with everything else.

The sweetest things to me during the uncertain times were the calls, and cards, and caring. It is very nice to know you are well-thought of and loved. Give your friend a chance to talk about it if she needs to. Offer to go along or drive her to her appointments and sit with her during treatments.

Ice packs, gentle massage sometimes helped. My friend made these wonderful tubesocks filled with microwaveable beans that were like oblong snakes. I could slip them, warm, behind me when my neck or back ached.

Sometimes a simple card game is helpful to distract the pain. Making sure her childrens' needs are met and that they have someone to talk to is important. It is a daily anxiety.

Standing around in the hospital room and talking to other people ABOUT the patient, even when she is doped up and seemingly asleep is a bad thing to do. It's important to include her in all conversations, or take it outside.

I was 17 when my mother died. We really appreciated the casseroles, etc. that people brought. I don't think we would have eaten properly if they hadn't. Towards the end we were crying every day. It's important to try to see that they eat right and regularly.

My schoolwork wasn't getting done and my grades were dropping. I had to go in and tell someone that my mother was dying. No one thought to do that for me. After that, my teachers were WAY kind to me and things were easier. Someone needs to help those kids cope with laundry and cleaning as well.

I hated my mom's pushy sister who tried to "mother" me. So you have to treat the kids with alot of respect. This is the most grown-up thing they've ever had to do.

I hope some of this helps. I don't know how comfortable you are with getting in there and doing hands-on stuff, but sometimes you just have to hope you'll be given the right words and wisdom along the way.

October 23, 2006
12:25 pm
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readyforachange
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(((Brynnie))) thank you so much. I thought when you were the first to respond that you had told me at some point that you were a cancer survivor. I didn't remember that it was breast cancer. I really appreciate all of your first hand knowledge and wisdom, and it will help me to help them as much as I can. Luckily, my friend's mother and sister and in town, and have been helping with the day to day things. Now that she's hospitalized, I don't know how much of this they can handle. I will offer to help again. I send a card just about every week, and ask what I can do about that often. The meals were very well received, and I didn't ask if they wanted us to do it...I just did it. I didn't take no for an answer.

Thanks for your input...and your prayers.

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