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My heart is hurting so bad!
June 21, 2006
5:06 pm
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Cooper
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September 29, 2010
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I have my things packed and will be leaving on Sat. I know that a higher being has been guiding me to what lies ahead. I sat in the floor one night and asked god to take over. Lead me in the right direction.
Two days later I got a call from my former employer offering me a career advancement and a lot more money. Then my present job is doing some restruction on classes that will be taught at the school where i teach and after this coming year the courses I teach will no longer be taught.
I got the job and have been packing for two days. My heart hurts so bad. I keep asking myself if I am doing the right thing and it seems as soon as the thought is in my head someone is standing there telling me i am doing the right thing and I will realize how horrible he has treated me all this time. I just don't know...seem to forget how much pain I have gone through over the past month, i always forgive and try to forget. But I can't forget the cheating and emotional abuse that he has put me where I am...I just feel like I must be a gluten for pain and punishment.
I look at something and start crying, some things I can't even pack, to look at them are too painful. Too many memories after 23 years. I may have a change of heart later, but right now I am just too sad.
Is this normal? I always thought people would be happy to leave a bad situation...
I just wished I could quit crying...
hope this makes sense...i am so emotional right now I don't even know what I am saying!
Thanks for listening...

June 21, 2006
5:10 pm
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CAMER
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September 30, 2010
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hi ((cooper))) your name sounds familiar and I am pretty sure I have seen you posting b4.

The feelings you are having are normal...most likely you are sad cuz of the dreams you may have had with this man are all gone...and maybe the hoping and wishing in the past for him to change, never happened for the good.

Rememeber, he cheated on you, that says alot of his character. Keep the focus on you, and know your higher power has you on the right road.

(((((much hugs and support))) camer

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