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My "friend" never asks about my life
January 23, 2005
8:49 am
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artist 2
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She only seems to call when things are falling apart for her. Should I dump her as a friend?

January 23, 2005
10:48 am
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silence
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I'm usually on the other side of that. I don't mind listening to people. But I really don't ask that many questions. Some people find me hard to talk to because they wait for me to prompt them. if someone wants to talk to me they just need to do it.

January 23, 2005
10:48 am
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shyshy
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I've heard it said that you shouldn't get rid of a "friend" for what they can't offer you but keep them for what they can. Are you getting anything at all from her friendship? If not, then I would say "see ya!"

January 23, 2005
11:08 am
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sewunique
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Artist,

I have a friend who complained to me one day, that I never ask her about her. Now this is not true. I ask : how are you" in polite social terms. she says fine. I told her that.

This is the clintcher: I told heer that it was HER responsibility to tell me when she is having a bad day and to tell what is on here mind. I told her I am not a mind reader, that if she ddoes not tell me or share things, how was I to know this?

She has always been protective of her life and feelings. But things reall, really were getting bad for her life and family stuff. Know what? she couldn't contain it any more and starting tallking!!!! It was rather stilted at first, but now she just talks more freely.

Point is, we have to talk and Communicate what is on our mind and what Our needs are!!!

Then again, I had a friend who only talked to me when things were bad and only wnted to hear the bad things in my life. When I"'d tell her things were going good, she'd bring up old boyfriends and dirt to make me unhappy. She was not satisfied with happiness, for her or for me. After 17 years of friendship, I dropped that frienship. It made me sad, but I was better off without that.

Two choices for you!

Sew

January 24, 2005
11:10 am
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artist 2
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Thanks for the feedback. My conclusion is that I might need to be more assertive with my issues to her.

January 24, 2005
11:24 am
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Anonymous
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I think you do too, I mean when I have a problem with a friend, or something, I will go to them and tell them, it may cause some ripples in the wave but in the end things get smoothed out and I don't lose a friend.

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