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Mother told me once: Leopards don't change there spots....she is the leopard
April 8, 2010
4:41 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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I am done.................no contact with family......horsefly

April 8, 2010
4:45 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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Yes..............horsefly.....madder than a hornet. Love Ya.......but enough is enough.....talk tomorrow..I hope..............HF

April 8, 2010
4:50 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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Just too mad and need to sleep.........can't. Been injected with steroids again and once again..steroids...sorry.....wish I could handle things....I was ..but not now. HF

April 8, 2010
4:57 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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I am crippled. Without this now....I give up........these shots are not going to cut it......my neurologist is retiring and I an stuck.......he wanted to install a pain pump in me....so they can't do epidurals on me.....constantly...my spine is about had it......my colon too.......screw it.

April 8, 2010
5:01 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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Oh Please.....my mother.....I know I will lose it if I even think about her...................madder than hell!

April 8, 2010
6:12 am
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CAMER
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((hf)))hope you are ok.......

seems like your mad at your mom & family too???

keep posting.....

((((((lotsa hugs.......camer)))))

April 8, 2010
7:05 am
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It No Longer Matters
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{{{{{horsefly}}}}}}

Bitsy

April 8, 2010
11:20 am
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MsGuided
Golden Horseshoe.ca
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(((Pegasus))))

I'm so sorry about your situation.Dealing with chronic pain, the medical system when poor, and then family not able to give loving support is tough.

You need to vent. Tell us what happened with your Mom. Get it out then we can know what you're really talking about. We can respond to details.

Perhaps if you do this you can find a way to focus on feeling better in your head, cause really, that's all you can do at this point. You gotta get these emotions and anger out hun and work toward a happier shift. It'll take time but you can't sit, fume, recede and let this eat you up.

What about your brother? Is he still around?

Is there anywhere local where you can get support for your grief?You need local support too.Maybe someone here from your area in the states can offer some direction.

Sending positive thoughts your way and a big hug ((((Pegasus))))

April 8, 2010
11:21 am
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sdesigns
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Oh Horsefly, I am so sorry to hear this. My gosh, I know the steroids really do a number on you, and all the physical pain that you continue to have.

As for your mother, well......you said it, they don't change their spots. My therapist asked me about my father- said "If you were to remove the label of father from him, would you let anyone else treat you that way?" The answer of course was no. Why do we give them so many chances when we know what they will do??

Hang in there, Horsefly and come back when you're feeling better.

SD

April 8, 2010
7:08 pm
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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no leopards never do change their spots but they can change their tune to confuse you...I have learned that very very limited contact has worked for me, I mean seeing her like maybe three times a year for a hour or so and that is it, all I can give to someone who hates me and herself more.

April 8, 2010
10:59 pm
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through_the_fire
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Beloved (((horsefly)))

I am so sorry you have physical pain and the pain of a difficult family (mother).

I am sending you healing thoughts for your body and mind.

Talk when/if you're ready.

Fire

April 9, 2010
3:00 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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Thank you all so much......just when I think I get my shit alright....it all hits back at me like .....I try hard...but I refuse critical opinions anymore from family.......knowing is one thing......being coda.....another hard part is detaching....Love to All....we know this! Thanks....horsefly

April 9, 2010
3:06 am
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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The chaplain was with me at the last pain shot 2 days ago.......I will be alright...........I think so.....once again....thanks to all...horsefly

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