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might be "codependent", new to me...confused
April 15, 2004
2:42 pm
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Californiadoll
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September 29, 2010
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Hi everyone, it has been recently brought to my attention that I could be "flirting" with codependency. a relationship was just ended with me because he was tired of constantly reassuring me that I was beautiful and wasn't fat. I would always tell everyone that I felt fat, ugly and disgusting. I also get jealous very easily which for some reason flares up inside of me and I end up saying things and doing things that I regret. I have a hard time controlling my temper some times. I haven't felt like myself in a long time and i'm pretty depressed. I might need to go on some low dosage meds to help me. Whatever the case, I want to chage so unbelievably badly but I have no idea how. I realize I have these problems such as low self-esteem and feeling like I can't love myself but i'm clueless as to how to change. Please help if you can.

April 15, 2004
3:56 pm
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CAMER
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September 30, 2010
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AFTER LOTS of therapy and with some
meds...I learned to love myself more, one good thing is try to stop the
**negative** thoughts in your head...try to think of positive one, think of all the good that you have
and focus on that....each person is
unique and once you love **youself**
its alot easier to transfer that love over to a HEALTHY relationship.

April 16, 2004
2:03 pm
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Joybelle
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September 27, 2010
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Hey babe!
I know exactly how you feel. I am a little bit, but my emotions are the same way. I have very low self esteem, but I look in the mirror and see that I am very pretty. I just don't feel it inside. My temper is crazy sometimes, I am very insecure with my husband sometimes.
I have recently started counseling and my therapist gave me a book to read called "Breaking free from the codependency trap." I priced it on amazon and it's only $2.14 + S.H. I think you should check it out.
I have been in counseling for 5 weeks and I agree Camer, I am learning to love myself. It takes time, certainly more than 5 weeks.
They also put me on Zanex. Be careful with meds, you don't need a Crutch, and it could turn into that very easily... So just be careful.. Good luck and remember you are never alone when it comes to this. You have already taken the first step!

April 16, 2004
4:09 pm
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Californiadoll
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September 29, 2010
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Wow, all of you are such big helps to me. I'm trying to get a grip on what could possibly be wrong with me and it seems like I can relate to JoyBelle a lot. I can't seem to trust any guys im with no matter how much they prove their love to me. I don't want to have to feel good only when someone compliments me, I want to feel good about myself so that if I do get in to a jealousy/temper fit, I know how to control it. sometimes, I would get really angry, almost like a fire inside of me when I would even think that my boyfriend was looking in the direction of another pretty girl. Sometimes, I would get angry when he would want to spend time with the guys. I felt lonely, ditched and upset. I know all of these feelings stem from the way I feel about myself. Because i'm not secure about myself. Now that i've lost my love, I want to change not only for him, but myself.

April 16, 2004
4:18 pm
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Californiadoll
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PS. Just bought that book on Amazon.com. Thanks for the tip! Can't wait for it to come.

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