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Me, My story, My life-RW
May 17, 2007
10:35 pm
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Randomwomen2
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Well my husbands aunt has caused us all terrible pain. She was taking care of 4 of her grandchildren ages 18months 4, 7, and 9. All of her children are drug addicts so they couldn't keep custody anyway. She had them for a year in a half. She was working on adopting. Well She found out that her husband was into porn age 10-15. So she kicked him out and a week later she was with her ex husband who beat her up so badly when she was young that she ended up in the hospital. Anyway Child services told her that she can either have contact with the man or the kids. She got married to him the next weekend. So the children were taking away probably never to be seen again. The youngest two were in my Sunday school class. My poor mother in law watched them for 60 hours a week. She is just heart broken. The youngest get to stay together and the oldest get to stay together. Who knows if the girls get to see there brothers again. How can someone choose a man over children? This is just beyond me.

May 17, 2007
10:37 pm
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ggfred4
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RW, that is the saddest story and I too don't understand. Why aren't children better protected? They are innocent! I am so sorry...

(((RW)))

May 17, 2007
10:42 pm
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Randomwomen2
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It just broke my heart when it happened. She said that she is finally living for her self. I just couldn't believe when she said that. MY CHILDREN ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING. I would do anything for my children. To me when you take children into your home they become your children. I have often thought about adopting children in the future.

May 17, 2007
10:45 pm
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ggfred4
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I feel the same way about my children, but gosh, those are babies!!! What is this going to do them?

May 17, 2007
10:51 pm
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Randomwomen2
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I am so scared for them. I have cried so much about this but yet here I go again

May 17, 2007
11:12 pm
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AQueen
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A couple nights ago a toddler was found filthy walking around downtown Seattle by himself! His mother was located eventually. She had left the child in her car while she went clubbing! He had no shoes, nothing! THEY GAVE THE CHILD BACK. I cannot understand this! I found out that animals have more rights than children here in the US. You cannot be homeless and have animals living in your vehicle. You must provide proper shelter but you can be homeless with you kids in a car! Friggin amazing! I hold my son and hug him tight everyday. I would never put anyone or anything above him. He's a innocent baby. That's why I left his father. Selfish is all I can say about people that choose drugs, alcohol, relationships over the welfare of their children or children in their custody.
AQueen

May 17, 2007
11:18 pm
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Anonymous
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(((RW)))

I have yet to read your thread now that Im putting more time here.

But just wanted to say, maybe the kids are better than worse off. Im sorry for your mother-in-law but something kept her from having the kids, right? And your aunt wasnt fit. So, hopefully they´ll adjust to an adopting family? And make something out of themselves and meet their sieblings. Life is all ahead of them. Ive been seeing kids that handle stuff so much better than I would have at their age. They are surprising when dealing with whats not ideal.

Im suspicious that the aunt who went for the marriage more like wanted a way out with the kids. Looks like she wrote her own sentence, though.

Im sorry if I didnt read far enough into the situation but I wanted to give you some other perspective on this. Im usually the devil´s advocate 🙂

Random, hope really really hope the kids will be alright. More than that, that theyll thrive and think of those who didnt want them as dung. The Bible says some people are like dung...

Kitty just went into the shower box and came back running. I didnt close the bathroom door and cats seem to like water from the shower stall. Man, she had a surprise, I dropped some ice there to melt. And its already cold here very very south of the equator. Its winter here now. But still the worst cold is the cold from people and the best warmth, the one from people like the guys here.

(((RW)))

(((GG)))

May 31, 2007
11:47 am
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Randomwomen2
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I have to believe that the kids are better off and that all of this happened for a reason. My son told me that joseph was coming over today and I had to sit down with him and tell him that Joe is not living with Phyllis anymore he has a brand new family to take care of him. It was one of the hardest things that I had to do cause afterwords he told me that he doesn't want Joe to go he wants to play with him. I cryed but The pain is starting to lesson

June 1, 2007
12:09 am
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Hi Random,

I am sorry to hear of your heartache. You are such a good mom. Being cross with your children is pretty normal when you are so tired and do not get much relief. I hope you will be able to find some coping tools soon....

I ran across a book that looked pretty interesting. I'll just copy and post the summary here. Maybe Fantas will see it as well?

The Whispering of Ghosts: Trauma and Resilience

Written by Boris Cyrulnik
Translated by Susan Fairfield

Overview
One out of every two people will experience trauma, says psychiatrist Boris Cyrulnik, and one in ten will remain a prisoner of that suffering.

Why are some children permanently damaged by difficult childhoods, while others grow up into secure, creative, loving adults? This book, based on Dr. Cyrulnik's broad experience with victims of childhood distress, offers a message of hope for everyone concerned about the impact of deprivation and such traumatic events as separation, emotional or sexual abuse, and violence in the environment.

The ghosts of the past keep on whispering to the child within the adult. Through dozens of moving, vivid examples, Dr. Cyrulnik describes the ingredients of resilience, the ability to heal the wounded self and move on, to make sense of what happened back then and form new emotional and social ties. Affection is such a vital need, he writes, that those who were deprived of it will attach themselves intensely to anything that rekindles a spark of life, whatever the cost. From the earliest parent-child bonding to the sexual turbulence of the teenage years, this book shows what makes for success or failure in the struggle to gain freedom from early pain.

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