Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Marriage on the Rocks
April 3, 2001
2:57 pm
Avatar
Annabelle
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I have been married for almost 10 yrs now.
We have 4 beautiful children. On and off for
the last 8 yrs my husband has been accusing
me of fooling around. Which is not true by
any means. After soooo many accusations, I
have become numb over the situation. No matter what I say, my husband does not believe me. He has gotten so angry that he
has put his fist through our garage door. He has gone as far as threatening to kill me
if he ever caught me! If I were fooling around on him, I think I would have been
caught at least once in the last 8 yrs. Nobody is that good! He also goes out with
his friend and gets trashed out of his mind,
sometimes doesn't even come home. I am not
allowed to go out with my girlfriend because
I am just looking for 1 thing. What's good
for the goose is not good for the gander here! I stay home during the day to take care of the kids and I work nights because daycare is too expensive. He has called my
work to see if I am still there and as soon
as I answer he hangs up. But whatever he does, I am not supposed to question. Whenever I do question, he acts like I am
writing a book. I am tired of being unhappy!!! Life is too short but I worry about the kids. Should I stay or go?! I don't think staying will make things better. He thinks there is nothing wrong except for my adultry (which there is none). I really need some answers
because I am running out of my own.
Any opinions are greatly appreciated!

Thanks!

April 3, 2001
6:33 pm
Avatar
Ladeska
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Well, well, well......what we have here is a man who is obviously scapegoating his own behavior and guilt onto you because he will not be responsible for what he is up to.

At any rate, you are being abused, to say the very least and it's not even an option whether or not you should stay for the children. Um.....noooooo......!!!! Call your local domestic violence shelter and ring up a lawyer, get some advice and get the heck out of there!!!

This is such typical behavior for someone that's doing the adultery and pulling bully stunts to intimidate you and confuse you. It's time for you not to be helpless one anymore and not be a victim no matter what it takes. These children DO NOT need this and you don't either. Nothing good coming down this road except escalation of more abuse and probable violence.

I would take every precaution for you and your kids safety though. Obviously, he's not going to be rational. So, please do call your local domestic violence shelter and seek guidance. If you need further assistance in this realm, write back and I will help further. You can call up a lawyer and get a free consultation on your rights in leaving regarding the kids, etc.

But, you have all the rights in the world to not live in or subject you or your kids to this. You erect some boundaries and don't take them down for anything, regardless of whether he pitches a fit, threatens or turns into a charmer for awhile. Just erect your boundaries higher everytime he trespasses. He has alot of problems and they probably won't get fixed any time soon, if ever. So, you set your sights on going on with your life, protecting yourself and your kids. Do not cling to - oh what if "maybe this or maybe that" in his direction. He just wants a dog to kick and it doesn't need to be you guys. Be smart though......he's the guilty one, so he will be watching you ready to pounce and blame you for everything. So get some counseling and good sound advice on everything you do and how to do whatever. He will be oh so crafty and oh so paranoid that someone will find out....who he really is or afraid that you will get out of his reach of abuse. Then he might have to face himself and that's very painful. Your pain isn't important to him......only that he doesn't see his own reflection here. Narcissim is a nasty taskmaster. It's all about me, me, me. So be very careful, every move you make.....be wise, be safe.

April 7, 2001
5:20 pm
Avatar
LETITIA
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

HI SWEETIE! I TO HAVE AN ABUSIVE HUSBAND. I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 11 YEARS NOW AND I CAN'T STOP LOVING HIM NO MATTER WHAT HE SAYS OR DOES. I TO HAVE 4 CHILDREN AND I WORRY ABOUT HOW ALL THIS WILL EFFECT THEM IN THE FUTURE. MAYBE WE ALL NEED SOME MARRIAGE AND FAMILY COUNSELING. I AM GOING TO SUGGEST THIS TO MY HUSBAND AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS. I HOPE YOU WILL DO THE SAME. TEN YEARS IS A LONG TIME TO JUST THROW EVERYTHING AWAY. BESIDES, YOU MUST LOVE HIM TO HAVE STAYED THIS LONG. KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND DON'T FORGET ABOUT GOD, HE HAS ALL THE ANSWERS! SINCERELY YOUR FRIEND .

April 7, 2001
5:35 pm
Avatar
LETITIA
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 247
Currently Online:
37
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110935
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38543
Posts: 714223
Newest Members:
jessicawales, documentsonline, SafeWork, thomasalina, genericsmartdrugs, 才艺
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2019 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer