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Lost my dog...my best friend
March 15, 2001
8:42 am
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Karin
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I had to put my dog down yesterday. Was the hardest thing I have ever done. She was beautiful...a pure bread Akita. She came to me six years ago thru marriage. Because my ex-husband is unable to take her (he's in the prison system for another two years) she became my dog for the past 1 1/2 years. She was loyal and loving and had no idea that she was a giant girl...weighing in at 140 lbs. My son took it hard too. She is ten years old and her health was ailing...I just couldn't afford the necessary surgeries that may have helped her. This was my first experience...holding her while she slipped quietly away...the thing that hurt the most was the way she was so concerned for me...because I was crying...she never could stand to see me cry and always comforted me...and that is what she was trying to do until she went to sleep for the last time. Pets are very theraputic (spelling)...they listen to all your woes and rejoice with all your highs. They never turn their backs on you and to them...you are everything. Today I will come home from work and not see that face...tail wagging so happy to see me drive up...bouncing as she rushes to the back door to be let out...giving me kisses along the way. The house will be unusually quiet...empty...I said in the name of this thread that I lost my best friend...I don't believe I will ever have a truer friend than my friend...Chance. Good bye my friend...I really hope that dogs do get to go to heaven and that she is doing all the things she loves. She will be missed terribly...she already is.

March 15, 2001
9:25 am
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Alena
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Good Morning Karin,
I was so touched by your post.

I had to put two of my best friends down in the last 10 years and it truly was a miserable moment I'll never forget.

There is no good way to lose a loved one. My first experience with euthanasia was my German Shepherd Heidi, loved her for 13 years and she loved me too. I lost her in what seemed to be an instant, something like a stroke which rendered her helpless. I had to give the okay to let her go. It killed me.
Just last March my husband and I had to take our beloved 4 yr old German Shepherd in to be put down due to uncontrollable epilepsy. We tried for 3 years to help him and I will never forget the look as we let him go.

If you've never had to do this, you just can't imagine the myriad of feelings that ramble around in your heart and head.

I know how you feel. I feel so badly for you and I can only say that some day you'll be able to remember the good times and laugh about Chance and her ways. Trust me, you will.

If you would like to read from others who have lost their dear friends, there is a wonderful web page for epi folks, but you can also go there and read about their losses and how they cope and there is a poem, The Rainbow Bridge. Anyone who has ever lost a pet and grieved needs to read it.

I'll be thinking of you and hoping each day gets better and less painful. Let me know how you're doing.

A big doggy hug,
Alena

March 15, 2001
9:26 am
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Alena
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Karin, I meant to post the website and didn't so here it is if you want it.

http://www.canine-epilepsy.com

March 15, 2001
9:16 pm
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Karin
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Thank you Alena for your words of comfort. I will take a look at the site you have recommended.

March 16, 2001
6:22 pm
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Molly
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I am so very very sorry. I too, had to put a family member away. I held him in my arms until the very end when the vet said its time to leave now. He had been with me for 14 years.The vet had told me to put him down for three years prior, my husband refused, think it was partially cause of the divorce, but it truly was the right thing to do, as was your choice. He was a life guard at the pool for my children, my constant companion, a bed hog, sometimes flea ridden, but always there for me. Your grief will pass although I am filled with tears right now as I post, there will be new loves and companions in your life, there is nothing like a dog, God spelled backwards. I have a new man in my life, and he is just as special as my first, but only sleeps on the bed when hubby is out of town, to big for all three of us. However the buggar manages to get in the shower with me, is that sick? Just his nose ok, But I feel your pain, and am so very very sorry. Our dogs are so very special. Time lots of time. But think about the blessing that he was for you when you needed it, he is at peace.. You will get the same love when you are ready, hard to believe, but I have it. It is just part of life. Again I am sorry.

March 16, 2001
8:51 pm
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Alena
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Karin, how are doing today?

Been thinking about you and your pain and loneliness and hoping that just knowing others are hurting with you will somehow lighten yours.

Take care, it gets better,
Alena

Molly, sorry to hear of your pain also. I've always thought it was so unfair that our dear pals age and leave us so soon. But having one sure beats not having one. Each time I lost one I said never again, but sure enough, another one followed. I cannot resist a puppy, or a sad eyed critter who needs a home. I wish I had a huge farm. But anyway, glad to hear you have a new fellow sharing your bed and your heart.

March 17, 2001
11:52 am
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Molly
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Sometimes they are just so much better than people 🙂

March 19, 2001
8:59 am
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Dilly
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I too lost my best friend Ben 3 months ago. He was a golden labrador, and a more faithful loyal mate you could never want. He was 11, and I knew his time was near, but, even at the last, he tried to stay with me, placing his big head on my hand. I too will never forget him, but what is even worse, is, when Ben was 6, we took another dog, Tom, from the same rescue home who at first was quite wild. Ben showed him there was no need for the fear that was behind all the wild behaviour and they became great mates. Tom is wonderfully behaved now, but he misses his friend desperately. Every time we go out for a walk, Tom hangs back, waiting for Ben to appear. It's heartbreaking, a constant reminder of the pal we both lost. Yes I recommend the poem that Alena suggests, but it took a while before I could read through the tears. The pain doesn't go away, it just becomes bearable after a while. God Bless, have a doggy kiss from Tom XXX

March 19, 2001
1:59 pm
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Brenda
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karin, old friend, how are you doing? It has been ages since you posted here, I dont come here much either.
How are you hanging in there? Is hubby still doing his time, are you\?
I hope not, I hope you arent suffering like you used to be, although the loss of your dog sounds like a big one Karin. I am truly sorry, I absolutely love dogs and I believe they are put on this earth to give unconditional love and bring out our softer, loving and nurturing side.
How is your son doing>? DId you move from the country? Are you alone now?
You are not alone friend, maybe you could journal your feelings regarding your beloved friend Chance, it will be like talking to someone. It is better to do this than stuff or repress your feelings of grief. Make a photo collage of her and tell her how much you love her. She will always be with you and you will both be reunited some day. god bless

March 21, 2001
8:31 am
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Karin
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Thank you Alena, and Molly for your words. It's been one week today. I still look for her all the time and not a day goes by that I don't wish she were here...and I know it will get easier...your words brought me much comfort. I will be fine...and one day I will bring home a new puppy...and am looking forward to that. I just want to allow some time before I do. My son goes to his father's in the summer so I am waiting until he comes home so that he can bond to our new "friend" as well.

Brenda,

It has been forever and I do check the site out now and then. I am doing wonderful (aside from losing Chance). My now ex-husband is still doing his time. He won't be released until 12/2002! But as for me...I am free! I am doing well! I met a wonderful man...and although it sounds so soon (I've been on my own now for 18 months!)...I am engaged to be married. He is unlike anyone I have ever known...and he loves both myself and my son with all his heart. And his heart is huge. We are getting married in June and relocating to another state. My corporate office is transferring me and well....I can honestly say I have finally found peace. This man has never done drugs...rarely drinks and has worked at the same place for 12 years. We share many interests in common and most of all...I am just as deeply in love with him as he is with me. Could go on and on...you know how new love is. But I won't bore you anymore.

I hope you are doing well...how are things with your husband? I hope you have found the peace you were looking for. I appreciate your thoughts and prayers...mine are with you as well. God Bless.

March 21, 2001
9:06 pm
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lost soul
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Hi Karin

Congratulations in advance 🙂 It's good to hear that everthing is going on well in your life 🙂

March 21, 2001
9:11 pm
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Karin
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Thank you Lost Soul. I am certainly enjoying the rainbows of life that always come after the darkest of storms. My your rainbows be vivid always...

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