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lost in the sauce
February 4, 2006
10:52 pm
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mesha
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September 27, 2010
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Hello everyone)
i really thought that i was the only one with these kind of relationship problems.. i can relate to everyone in so many ways..me & my ex have now been separated for about a week..we were together for about 4yrs when we first got together we couldn't get enough of each other just spent most of our time together..after about a year he moved in with me & were happy till about a year ago when the problems started he's 25 & i'm 30..i thought in the begining he was a responsible person but it turned out he's not..i noticed he wasn't paying his credit card bills,car note ,his parents kept asking him if he was paying them like he was a 17yr old now i c why..he had 2 give back his car..has no credit..so me who always tries to help everyone we can just use mine for now till you get one..almost a year later no car..no money,no credit..i'm not the type of person who is with someone for money & what they have.. i can take care of myself..i just thought he was just putting it off like everything else..we got into a couple arguements over it he feels i pressure him & nag him but all i tried to do was help him get on his feet..he got a new job so we were on different schedules..than he just started going out with his buddies a couple times a week sometimes come home drunk & just go to sleep..he got very distant.. we basiclly had no more sex life cause he says he's always tired..when ever i asked him to go out somewhere with me he didn't feel like it or was tired..so i started getting angry that he can come home 3am from hanging out with his buddies but when it came to me he was tired..to do anything....which really bothered me & made me feel like there was a problem..when i would ask him whats going on are you happy he says yes it's just me thats not happy for some reason..i explained to him over & over i need to know that he cares...told him i felt he was very distant..& i need some intimate contact..things that we used to have..till last week he went out for drinks & never called & didn't come home..i was really upset & hurt he didn't call me made me feel like he really just doesn't care about his life & is just going down hill & i didn't want to be dragged down with him..so i told him to leave move back home...he just could see what the big deal was said if i was so worried why didn't i call him & i felt that was just it for me..he left next day called me saying he's sorry he hurt me it's his fault i told him to come home he said he can't that he's going to move back home ..so the next day he came over & i thought maybe i did just blow up on him..so i told him we can work it out & he says i would be happier with out him he was moving out...now he's back home & i miss him very much..i'm so confused part of me wants to take him back & the other thinks he would just drag me down with him..dunno if im just suppose to except what he's doing with his life because i love him..or i feel if i just let him go i'm being selfish because i want more out of my life than he want out of his..we've gotten to the point before when we discussed him leaving & tried to work it out & it's good for a month or 2 than just goes back to him being distant, me getting upset because he makes me feel he doesn't care about me...O i didn't realize i'm just going on & on..anyway if feels good to vent ..if any has any insight feel free to reply)

February 11, 2006
5:37 pm
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hocuspocus
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September 30, 2010
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Maybe he is just too immature and you should give it some time apart and see how things develop. I have a similiar situation, which didnt develop until after I was married and have children, and I wish I could run as far away from the situation that I am in, but its a little harder at this point. Give yourself time to be sure about this guy, do you really want to be like his babysitter??

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