Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Lonely and afraid to make friends
July 7, 2007
9:39 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Yes, it's true. After feeling betrayed one too many times by people I thought were friends, I have an extremely hard time making any new friends. Unfortunately, this makes me lean pretty hard on any man in my life.

How do I go about trusting enough to open up to friendship?

July 7, 2007
9:41 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Also, I find that being without friends makes my life seem way over-exaggerated and things that happen seem gigantic. I lose perspective. It felt so much better when I could lean on a friend.

July 7, 2007
9:45 pm
Avatar
Rasputin
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 0
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Artist~

Disappointments are part of our life. We can't expect things ALWAYS to work out.

In my healing program we are requested and encouraged to reach out in love and expect to be let down. But that should NOT discourage us from starting over.

Read my thread "Bad things happen to good people despite our best intentions." I hope you will relate to me and realize hon that...you're not alone and Tomorrow is another day where we will meet new people with whom we will click.

Never give up!!!!

Blessings!

July 7, 2007
9:50 pm
Avatar
Rasputin
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 0
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

and have a PET. They can add a lot of fun and comapy to your life!!!!

July 7, 2007
10:46 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thanks I have a cat and she's my best bud! I guess I will think about trying again. I need some friends!!

July 7, 2007
11:26 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

I know what you mean about things seeming bigger than they are sometimes. Friends help put things in perspective, sometimes without even talking about what you are preoccupied with. Just the fact that they are their seems to make things better. More laughter, more conversation, more fun, more companionship, more distraction... it's only natural when that's missing that the negative seems larger and more overwhelming.

However, we have to look towards a future- even if it is unknown, and hope for the best. What is the alternative. This is something that is so hard to work on. I don't know about you, but for me, in the past making friends was effortless. How does one just "start" going out and making friends? So I know how you feel. Maybe we don't have to try as literally as it seems, just go about living your life, making yourself happy, doing things a long the way maybe that make others happy, put time into things you feel passionate about... these are things I'm trying to do. It's slow going, and I'm getting frustrated, I have to admit I wish I could fast forward through this period of my life. But all I can do is go one day at a time.

I wish the best for you. Hang in there.

hugs,
ella

July 8, 2007
2:17 am
Avatar
marypoppins
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 4
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Artist 2,

All I can say is that I know how you feel. I'm also afraid to make friends and lonely because of it. Sometimes I tell myself that with work and my family, I don't have time for friends, but that's not it. I used to talk more with friends at work, but I began to think bringing too much of my personal life into work wasn't professional. So now I'm considering taking a yoga class or a dance class, where I'd have fun, develop more confidence, and perhaps make friends.
Good luck to you.
Poppins

July 9, 2007
10:12 am
Avatar
risingfromtheashes
st regis falls, ny
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 14
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

artist

I have come to realize that if we have HIGH expectations for "friends", we will be sorely disappointed, just like with men.

Not to say we shouldn't have SOME expectations.

But, if we look to depend on our friends as much as we depend on men...we will have much of the same trouble.

So, meet people...figure out what they can bring to your life...perhaps you find someone who is fun to have coffee with, someone who is fun to shop with , someone else who is fun to hit the movies with....but maybe not ONE person who is "all that".

grow your network...don't depend on them to be your only source of entertainment....know that one person cannot be "everything" to you...but someday you will find someone who can be your best friend...but in the meantime...have a network of people you enjoy on "some" level, and enjoy them for that.

As you learn to meet people and get to know them...you may find they are more than you expected...others may not fit the bill and need to be let go along the way.

but all of it takes time.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 247
Currently Online:
43
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110905
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38534
Posts: 714189
Newest Members:
sendlv, ViolentFighterBrownCaveman, kbrfDazy, traceyob69, JohnMeave, EthanDiord
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2019 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer