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Life is short my friend diagonsed with 2 years tol live- feeling lost
April 20, 2007
12:29 pm
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Anonymous
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I feel like someone punched me in the gut and sucked all of the air out of my lungs. My friend is 23 and she just had a baby. Her boyfriend is an ASS and said she did it on purpose but she didn't. She had her little girl two weeks ago by emergency-c section because hers and the babies blood pressure were extremely elevated. I found out today that she was diagoned with a rare bone marrow disease and the doctor told her she only has about 2 years to live!

I just can't believe it. I am in total shock, it just doesn't seem fair. I called her Mom and she said they were both in shock. She said she wanted to talk but she was too upset. She said she is trying to be strong for her daughter and not let her see her cry. I told her I loved them both and if she was ready to talk or cry I was here.

I am just so shocked, sad and sick. It doesn't make sense.

Please pray for her and her family.

April 20, 2007
12:44 pm
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lollipop3
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((((feelinglost))))

My thoughts are with you and your friend.

April 20, 2007
1:14 pm
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fantas
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Feelinglost, I send you and them lots of hugs and love....

April 20, 2007
2:02 pm
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StronginHim77
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feelinglost -

I don't know if your friend lives in the U.S., but if she does, go online and locate the nearest one of The Healing Rooms (they are based in Seattle, but over 350 across the country now). Have her go. They will pray for her. Incredible amounts of terminally ill people have been physically healed through their outreach.

- Ma Strong

April 20, 2007
5:35 pm
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Honolulugal
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Oh, dear, FL, how incredibly awful. Does she have a really great doc who will pull out all stops to treat her?

Ma has a good idea. I've heard of this even in Canada. They offer great comfort.

H.

April 20, 2007
8:20 pm
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balancesekr
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Oh my god, that is heartbreaking. I feel empathy for you and your friend.

Is there any way this information is inaccurate, has she gone for a second opinion?

April 20, 2007
8:24 pm
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Rasputin
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(((FL)))) Your friend and her family and new baby will be in my prayers. Please keep us posted!

April 20, 2007
8:55 pm
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taj64
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I am sorry about your friend.

April 21, 2007
12:01 pm
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Anonymous
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Feeling, that IS a big punch to hear you have only 2 more years with your friend. However, HP has the final say. Lets hope she has 2 or more years in comfort and able to care for and enjoy her baby. It seems she would do better without the boyfriend. You are a good friend. Be strong! Sending you all my prayers!

April 23, 2007
8:42 am
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Anonymous
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I haven't heard from her all weekend 🙁 I am worried

April 23, 2007
4:29 pm
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soprano2
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Feeling.

Your thread makes me want to cry. It has not been two long since one of my three best friends passed away in a similar way. When he found out, he only lived ten months. Ten lousy months. If you ever want to talk, cry or scream, let me know. I have been through this and it truly sucks.

Nothing that you can do in life prepares you for this. Some days will be easy. Some will be harder. My advice to you is to help her in any way that she can.

When we found out that my friend was dying, the first thing that he did was to make a list of things (kinda like that song, "To live like you were dyin'"--I forgot who did that song.) I did my very best to help him do as many things as he felt up to.

Most of all, I was there when he needed a hug, or a hand to hold, or a ride to the doctor, or a shoulder to cry on.

My heart hurts for you and your friend, feelinglost, and keep us posted.

s2

April 23, 2007
4:53 pm
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feelinglost,

I am so sorry your friend (and her family and friends) has to cope with this blinding news.

Please know you all will be in my prayers.

I think the best thing ever that you can do for your friend is be a constant in her life now. Just keep calling and popping in. Listen. Bring your love and smiles and let her know how much she means to you. You can help them all in their need to be courageous.

And when you are hurting....bring that here..:)

April 23, 2007
4:59 pm
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nappy
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Feeling, I am so sorry for the news that you received. I will keep you and your friend in my prayer.

I have read your post but I hesitated to write because I went through the same thing as you with this news, the doctor told me and my sisters and brother that my mother only had a year to live. Well being a kid, I was counting everyday and praying until that time was near and my mother lived longer then what the doctor said. I hate when the doctors tell you that and especially to the families that have to live with fear everyday thinking that it is there last day when I realize that it is god say when it is time for us to go home.
Nappy

April 24, 2007
9:59 am
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Anonymous
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(((soprano2)))

Thanks for writing. I am sorry to hear about the loss of your friends. I guess all I can do is be there for her like you were for your friends. I just can't imagine what is going through her mind...

April 24, 2007
10:04 am
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(((Nappy)))

I can't even imagine how you felt. Were the doctors right about your Mom? I will pray for a miracle to.
I guess you are right when its your time to go, its time to go. I just find it very hard to process why children die, why good people get sick, and then bad people roam freely about life. It just doesn't seem fair.

I have not heard from my friend and I am so worried. Do you think sending flowers would remind her of a funeral. I was going to send flowers and someone said to me it would make me feel like a funeral. I didn't even think of that.

I admire your faith Nappy.

April 24, 2007
10:06 am
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(((Brynnie)))

Thanks for the support. I am just in total shock about everything. I am worried because I haven't heard from her since Thursday. She is so young and just had a brand new baby. Life just doesn't make sense to me sometimes..

April 24, 2007
10:29 am
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soprano2
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How are you and your friend doing today? Have you talked to her yet.

Please know that sometimes you are going to have to make the effort to keep in touch with her. She may feel like "why bother" or "she just feels sorry for me." Always go the extra mile. You will be able to tell if it is too much.

April 24, 2007
10:33 am
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nappy
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Feeling, How are you doing this morning?
The doctors was right about what she had but they wasn't right when they told her how long she had to live.
Sweetheart, life is not fair, we just have to live it the best way we know how in this life. Life is like a book, we have a beginning, we have a middle, and we have an end. We write the story of our life and how we live it.
That is why it is to important to enjoy YOUR life because we only have one.
If you want to send your friend some flowers then do it. Don't be afraid to continue to be her friend. If you were there when she was up, then be there when she is down.
That is why I say to you since you have been here is that life is to short to be worrying about the small stuff and continue with your life. And may you have a bless day.
Have faith!
Love
Nappy

April 24, 2007
10:54 am
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Dear feeling,

Thinking about her little baby just breaks my heart. I wish I could send you all this wisdom about why life isn't fair. There's a passage in Job about the SIN of questioning what God intends -- just interesting to me that we get angry and want to fight it as injustice. I think mostly it is fear.

When I went through my chemo treatments, a wonderful young man was doing the same thing for his cancer. We were both bald together. One day, he was up on a roof, working, and I walked to the backyard where no one could see me, and pulled off my scarf and yelled up at him and waved it at him. He laughed and pulled off his bandana and waved it back at me. He did not survive. He was a junior in college. We still ache for the loss of his brilliance and wisdom.

And I have to chastice myself when I sometimes feel "survivor's guilt".

I don't think you have to understand why. But it's important to celebrate life while it's here. By all means, send her flowers. With a note telling her how much you care. Send her this great little "courage" angel that I was given (Hallmark makes them). People sent me books about cancer so I could learn more about what was going on. One friend gave me a blank book so I could "journal" my feelings.....after all, this is a very important "leg" of your friend's life's journey, and it would be great if she could leave this much history and legacy for her child.

You have an opportunity to help her and her loved ones prepare. And in the process, your own life will be blessed as well. I loved the symbolism of the courage angel. It gave me hope and confidence that I could handle whatever was coming. And the idea that I wasn't alone, that friends truly did understand some of my feelings, was intensely supportive.

April 24, 2007
11:10 am
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nappy, our posts crossed. You are so sweet. We lost our mom when I was 17. I really was still a kid, too, and I surely didn't "get it" then (like I think I do now). I think you and I just said pretty much the same thing. I wish I had had someone who could have said more of these things at the time, except I may not have been capable then to understand. Perhaps they WERE saying good things, but I was not hearing....

my favorite person right now is a 94-yr-old aunt who is incredibly busy -- just living!! I've been learning so much from her. About choices. About choices about how you decide you are going to feel.

April 24, 2007
3:13 pm
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nappy
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Brynnie,
Thank you! When my family was going through this pain, I didn't understand as a kid. I guess as being the oldest I had to step in and take care of my younger brother and sisters. I truly wish that they did have some kind of help for us, someone that we could talk to but we didn't get the help that we truly needed. I guess I didn't have time to just really think about how I was feeling, I just knew that when they lower my mother into the ground, my life as a kid was over and I had became an adult right then and there.

I was truly bless because I didn't waste one moment in being with my mother. I embrace everything about her in that time frame. Her touch, her scent, her voice, everything that I could. She was the one who taught me that life is to short and that we must live our life the best way we know how, with god help of course.

My grandmother, bless her soul was the one that step in for us and I understood that she was getting old but she taught me the most valuable thing and that was about life. Right to this day, things that she have said has came up in my life time now. Both women was great teacher and I was bless for having that.

Nappy!

April 25, 2007
9:30 am
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Soprano2,
Hi how are you today? I have not talked to her but I did send her an e-card to let her know I was thinking about her.

April 25, 2007
9:32 am
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So True Nappy! I guess it isn't fair at times. I just wish I could rationalize it in some way. I am sorry you had that experience with the doctors. Love you Nappy.

April 25, 2007
9:38 am
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atalose
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feelinglost,

I am so sorry to hear about your friend, its so sad I can't even think of any kind of encouraging words for you, I'm so sorry. I have never been through that type of loss, maybe others here can offer more.
You are in my thoughts.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

April 25, 2007
9:38 am
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Brynnie,

That story about the roof top is SO touching, it made me cry but in a good way. Are you in good health now, I admire you for your courage. I will take your advice and keep showing my love even if she isn't ready to talk.

Thinking about the baby is killing me too. Her name is Bella and she is beautiful and perfect 🙂 I guess if nothing else she gets to experiences the love and mircale of a child. Hopefully that will give her the strength and courage to fight.

Thank You 🙂

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