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Lesson in "Intradependence 101"........
May 15, 2008
3:49 pm
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September 27, 2010
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Intra (as opposed to "co") in the sense here recently that my car has transmission problems and will not run.

(HATE that!!!!)

Grant it, I have always the been the person willing to "go it alone" with a "Plan B" up one sleeve and "Plan C" up the other sleeve.

Only now. Not the case.

Just really "winging it." here lately.

Don't really know if this is a coincidence or not - but recently found myself surfing through the channels and came across a PBS kid's program entitled: "Asking For Help."

Was the second time I came across this particular show.

So. OK. Yesterday, the transmision in my car goes kaput. Someone pulls over right away to help me - turns out to be a neighbor of mine I've never met.

(Note - I really just keep to myself.)

She helps me get my car back to my house and just this morning sees me walking to the little store at the top of the hill and offers me a ride - to which I accept.

Then - this afternoon, as the tow truck arrives and hauls my car off to the shop - it's raining and I ask him if he can drop me off at the top of the hill and he agrees (since it is on his way.)

So - I get what I needed at the store and am walking back to my house in the rain - when ANOTHER neighbor asks if I wanted a ride and I accept. Turns out she just lives right up the road.

So. The lesson here. Referring back to original thread title is that perhaps there IS such a thing as having a healthy "Intradependence" with other neighbors. That's its OK to (as the PBS show illustrated) to Ask For Help.

News to me.

Feels like I am dipping my big toe into the water for the first time and am discovering that maybe....just maybe...there aren't a bunch of sharks circling about ready to bite it off!!!!!



Maybe a good thing!

I am quite surprised as to the ladies (my neighbors)which have helped me thus far.

Maybe....just maybe.....I CAN trust - to a certain degree.

(Quite a revelation to this "neighborhood hermit" -aka -"shut-in." "anti-social woman with all the cats etc...")

Maybe - just maybe - not everyone is "out to get me."




Maybe quite the "good thing."

Maybe I have been too harsh on stereo-typing my neighbors in this trailer park....linking all the obnoxious, red-necky "bad seeds" together.

Obviously - not the case here recently.

sigh and whew and grateful for the recent expression of kindness when I am feeling most vulnerable!

Quite the lesson....indeed and - IN DEED.

(I stand corrected in my assumption that all of my neighbors are nothing more than just "poor white trailer trash"......notwithstanding.....my OWN self as well!)


May 15, 2008
4:34 pm
lovin life
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i also have a really hard time asking for help. and back-up plans galore for every possible situation that may come up. i don't necessarily think people are "out to get me", more they are not capable of handling anything. i must handle everything myself!

with regard to your other post, i consider myself pretty "high strung" and i don't do well if things change. my physical reaction tends to be anger rather than fainting...but i am working on that!

have you ever been on meds for panic/anxiety disorder? i haven't.

May 15, 2008
5:15 pm
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September 27, 2010
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lovin life,

Thanks for sharing your experience.

I did take paxil for a long time.

On one hand, it did seem to help to some degree, but basically - to me - it just sort of "dulled" my whole range of emotions across the board and I really didn't like that.

I know this may sound a little crude - but actually - when I finally decided to get off of paxil myself - I knew and read about the possible dangers and was lucky enough to be able to spend the time in bed. To just "sleep most of it off."

My eyeballs wanted to somehow jitter and stuff in coming off of it - but I armed myself with BONNIE - the OTC motion sickness pills in the interim.

I can say without a doubt - during that time - that in coming off the paxil - (I know this may sound really, REALLY strange....) but my first bowel movement in finally ridding myself of this drug felt like an absolute RELIEF!!!!!

Like - I was gaining my own self back.

(Of course - little did I know that my emotions would be plastered and bouncing all over the place....)

Still, to me, it was better than just having an overall blanket "numbing" of my high/low emotions across the board - you know?

I think that anger is a good thing.

I truly believe that a sense of dire hopelessness can not co-exist when a sense of anger and finally "standing up for yourself" prevails.

For I think that it is that very anger (no longer censored or minimized or rationalized away) which might just lie at the very crux of the whole problem.

Giving ourselves PERMISSION to react and feel anger.

(Against ALL covert maneuvers in which this society quitely and very strategically tries to set in place....you know?)

If I EVER somehow and in someway are EVER able to somehow and in someway get beyond all this crap....all I have to say is - LOOK OUT WORLD......For I AM A FORCE to be reckoned with - and to which - you TOO will recognize your own POWER and SELF in this process!!!!!!

I am but only a mere mirror!

Damn skippy!

(Sometimes - the ONLY fricking thing that keeps me going!!!!!)


November 27, 2020
2:22 am
Forum Posts: 13
Member Since:
June 9, 2020
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Yes, a great lesson about mutual assistance. We always need time to realize that we are all people and we all need help))

November 27, 2020
2:30 am
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Member Since:
October 30, 2020
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