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LAZYNESS - Can anyone provide some academic facts such as definition, behavior description, overcoming it, etc?
March 7, 2007
12:07 pm
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Anonymous
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Ive been dwelling on this for some time now. Im depressed, teach at night (which I dont like much but thats how it is for now) and have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning. Thinking Im lazy seems abominable to me, makes me wanna cry. Im also a procastinator and a perfectionist... ugh!

Thanks for any input, especially on the lazyness concept.

March 7, 2007
12:21 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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I can't quote any academic info, but I can give you my own personal two cents.

I suffer the same afflictions...tho I don't work at night, so I have no excuse.

I am also a perfectionist...so sometimes it seems like if I can't do it "perfect", why do it at all. It's discouraging to do something to less than my standards, but I don't always have the time or energy to do it the way I think it needs to be done. For this part of the problem, either you have to go easier on your own expectations, OR budget your time so you can tackle the issue little by little so it's not so overwhelming.

Next - I don't eat right or exercise...and I KNOW this contributes to my lethargy.

Your late night sleep habits could also be contributing...lack of sleep is a huge factor in most cases.

Motivation - this could be linked with a mild form of depression...I know that I am more motivated when I am taking my anti-dpressants...and really "glum" when I don't. Again, a healthy diet and exercise are also very helpful. Vitamin supplements may help too.

I am also a procrastinator...something I learned from my dad...who was king of "I'll get to it someday"...as a kid I used to wait and wait and wait for him to get it done....one day I put "SOMEDAY" on the calendar....he wasn't amused when the day came and I said "someday is here, can we get that project done NOW?".

Sometimes I find that if I make a list and cross of what needs to be done as I get it done, it's motivating enough for me to not procrastinate so badly. But also, procrastination could come from your internal idea that something SHOULD be done by a certain time, when you know in your gut, you have more time than you believe you do. And that's where you have to go easy on yourself and realize that you WILL get it done and trust yourself to get it done...and if it's at the last minute, and it gets done right...what's the big deal?

I hope that helps...you are not alone!

March 7, 2007
1:01 pm
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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sininho, The only way I have over come this...Which I have both (overwhelmed by my perfectionism) I make a list ...I make sure I check off what I get done on the list. I start with the possible that I have control over and then as I do it I check it off. It could be just cleaning out my bathroom...then the bank....But to start one thing at a time...First things first ..horsefly

March 7, 2007
1:10 pm
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Anonymous
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Rising, your own personal two cents are so valuable. I know my standards are high, too. And I do rise to pressure though I don´t like it. Eating and exercise are a problem, too. But I don’t suffer from lack of sleep.

Motivation is nil most of the time as I have chronic major depression as far as I know. I need to think of vitamin supplements...

Perfectionism easily makes a procrastinator, doesn´t it? As Im 47, Ive seen the two taking over me and myself trying to keep up with the fight. The day "SOMEDAY" is on my vocabulary, yoo. I swear to myself I wont buy any more material to sew, crafts to make, etc, someday... My dad was a procrastinator, too. I also had a boss who used to write on some memos “WHENEVER”.

So having time is also a problem, hey? I see that. I take my time planning and building up anxiety. So in the end there is little time left. I need to learn to relax and enjoy my tasks. Starting little by little is good; the hard part is starting!

“Go easy on myself (…), if it gets done right...what's the big deal?” Youre right!

Well, what about feeling like crying about laziness? Could it be I´m divided between my mom (workaholic) and dad (laid back)? Even if theyre dead. A psychiatrist once told me that we´re 50% our mothers and 50% our fathers. If they separate and if one speak ill of the other, we also feel like we´re being taken half of our identity. My parents were separated. I stayed with my mom and she couldnt help but say my dad was very nice BUT this and BUT that...

I need to go to the psychiatrist´s appt tomorrow, which has been feeding into my doubts. That´s why Im so miserable. At the end, she´ll probably say, the answers are within yourself, argh!!

(((tks rising)))

PS: THE CORRECT SPELLING IS LAZINESS, NOT LAZYNESS. SORRY.

March 7, 2007
1:18 pm
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Horsefly, hi!! Ive had lists and lists and didnt get going. The lists looked like a directory of windows with planned start and end!!!!! Good for you you arent that obscessive! Checking off the tasks done is really an incentive when I do it.
Starting with the one that I "have control over", now that´s a good tip. Doing the manageable first and remembering: First things first is also good.

So Im going to get off my savings (why do they say that here I dont know) and sweep my classroom.

I dont feel that much like crying anymore, either.

But, what if someone calls me lazy? Do I tell them I have many certificates and two diplomas? Or do I fold and bury myself in self-pity?

(((Tks, Horsefly!)))

PS: I need to go out soon but I will write about an ABC method for not procrastinating.

March 7, 2007
1:35 pm
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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Sininho, i completly respect Rising. I have learn so much to help myself from her. The just know I couldn't spell procastinastion right, so I didn't mentionn it. But I am down on that word ------PROCAstinaaaat----- it is a negative thing......sometimes things just need to be left alone until we get a better angle at then . Sometimes just the list of the things I can do now and another I can put off for later helps me feel in more contol of my on life...horsefly

March 7, 2007
5:17 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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sininho
I know how you feel I feel the same way.

March 7, 2007
9:02 pm
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truthBtold
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Hey Guys....why don't we give ourselves a break for once - OK?

I think that "laziness" might be confused with unhappiness, frustration and depression.

Let's look at the flip side of this coin and consider what it was like for us in the past when we didn't consider ourselves "lazy?"

When have you NOT felt lazy?

I'll bet - if you are like me - it is when you are around other people and places whom were in "your element." - you know?????

I used to think that I was "lazy" - but have now come to realize that I am just simply unhappy and depressed and frustrated instead.

Quite a difference.

When I get near the beach (I grew up in Miami) I am not lazy. I am "in my element." I get so damned relaxed that I couldn't even make a fist - even if I tried.

This feeling of frustration and anxiety and depression is a message to us...that we are not doing and acting in a way that pleases our innermost dreams and our not following our heart's desires.

Laziness - please -let's give ourselves a break here........

We don't need academic facts, definition, behavior description, tips on overcoming.....we are just NOT in the place that we should be.....and our hearts simply know better!

It's just as simnple as that!!!!!!

March 8, 2007
6:33 pm
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Anonymous
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TruthBTold, I think you are right on target on ´being in the element´. I believe all concepts have to do with the culture one lives in. What´s laid back for one is lazy for another and a loser for many.

So your valuable advice is to follow one´s heart! It´s nice to hear that. Not that it´s easy but definitely a good course.

The funny thing is when get in your element and feel active and engaged they have a suspision of hipomania...

Anyways, the answers are within, the answers are within, the answers are within, remember that Sininho and leave your codependency aside for a while....

tks, TBT

March 8, 2007
7:19 pm
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Lazy is that kid who will "watch" his parent go back out to the car for the rest of the groceries. Got that from my MOM!!

Lazy is not being accountable for your use of your time and talents??? Expecting someone else to come in and pick up the pieces? Assuming you're not responsible when you ARE?

March 8, 2007
11:00 pm
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Brynnie, very good examples!

Definitely not accountable for time and talents sometimes. Only when there is depression involved, it gets confusing. I guess that´s when one needs to check for a clean conscience. In a depression crisis, I usually feel guilty but helpless. When the crisis passes, I try to be busy again.

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