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Its over - wait no - wait yes - wait no.......
October 5, 2004
6:17 pm
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JiltedTallMan
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Hello I'm new. Been inn a relation for two years. Engaged. But now everthing unraveled. We stopped seeing each other. But my other keeps communicating, but for a unknow reason as. My partner has booked a single holiday, posted on a singles website. Yet wants to talk.

I need reinforcement. Is it time to say leave me be?

October 5, 2004
6:31 pm
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fairy99
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Only you can decide that, but ask yourself have the two of you talked thru all of this and said all that is needed to be said?

I would definatly say that it sounds as though she is moving on but if she truely was she would have no contact at all. Have you asked her why she contacts you after all the single stuff?

October 5, 2004
6:31 pm
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Bianca
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Yep - I would. Right now she has the best of both worlds, and isn't forced to make a decision.

I was in your fiance's position, kept waffling on what I wanted to do... get married, stay single, stay with him, find someone else...

He finally had to put his foot down and I am now forced to really consider what I want. It is actually turning out that I want him, which is pretty cool. And I gained a lot of respect for him when he made me take some time away from him.

Besides that - you need to look out for your heart, which is probably being torn into pieces as she continues to lead you on while dabbling in the single pool.

October 6, 2004
4:42 am
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wireless_tech
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Hey jilted,

I have to tell you, I have been going through the same thing you are going through now. Leave her! tell her to get lost! It doesnt matter how much shit you have been through together, how much you have in common, what you klnow about each other, anything!

In my situation, it just came down to a head two dys ago, and now its over. She left me for another guy, and I still wanted her back. She still called me every single day while she she was still seeing this guy. I should have let go a long time ago, but I didnt. Oh well. Im only human

October 6, 2004
10:00 am
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CAMER
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Jilted, yes it sounds like she does want the best of both worlds...cuz she still communicates with you, but books a "single" holiday and on a singles website.....don't be the one man on her "backburner" incase her next conquests don't well....you should just tell her that she either
gets back with you (if that's what you want) or YOU will leave her.
Don't let this girl mix up your head.
Good luck!
camer

October 6, 2004
10:24 am
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JiltedTallMan
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Thanks for input. We are going to see a therapist today. It should be interesting. I just hope I can release my true feelings and intentions. I tend to clam up and answer questions as they need to be answered. (I'm VERY good at that!)

THose of you who working this out. What were the consequences? I am afraid of working this out only to find out it all was a control issue.

October 6, 2004
10:40 am
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CAMER
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JILTED, just be honest with YOURSELF, that is part of codependency, and even if it was a control issue, now is the time to take control of your own life, you do have choices, and choices that can make you happy, just be as honest as possible with your gf and the therapist and keep working on yourself and do what is best to make
yourself, your wants and yours needs to a happier life.
Camer

October 6, 2004
11:30 am
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kathygy
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If its a control issue therapy can help you with that. I've been in couples counseling and it won't work unless you are open and honest. Speak your truth.

October 6, 2004
10:47 pm
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Anonymous
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Sounds like that song by Wilson Phillips have you heard it "release me".

I heard it last night gosh I can relate.. 😉

(((((Hugs)))))))

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