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Is there REALLY light at the end of the tunnel?
November 6, 2004
4:22 pm
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brendalee
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I dunno. My whole life - I've been hoping for it - but so far...none. Getting old and tired. Don't know how to be any other way but hopeless - really. Also, I hate the fucking holidays coming up......

November 6, 2004
4:25 pm
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CAMER
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Is there anyway you can stop the negative tapes running thru your head and replace them with good things about yourself, you must have
some good qualities!

November 6, 2004
4:27 pm
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sdesigns
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Hi brendalee: You're not alone in dreading the holidays. I hate them.

I wish I could cheer you up. There are probably good things happening to you, maybe you just don't recognize them?

I'm not too happy myself but I never am on Saturday. I call it my depression day and I rarely leave the house. Don't want to run into the ex and his new one so I hide in my cave and obsess. At least I can come here and have poeple to talk to.

You wanna have a pity party? I'll join you. I can bring something chocolate, or maybe a cheesecake? We can eat the whole thing! SD

November 6, 2004
4:29 pm
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CAMER
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good idea SD!!! let me join in on the fun...gosh, don't you wish life was a lil' bit more easier!!! thank goodness we are not alone!!!

November 6, 2004
4:30 pm
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brendalee
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Honestly Camer, I just don't know how to be hopeful...it's so foreign of a concept for me. I'm so tired of just functioning....don't see any future for myself...never have. I'm just getting older - and tired...feel like throwing in the towel.......whew.

November 6, 2004
4:34 pm
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brendalee
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My house is such a mess! I live with 6 cats in the majority of the house with a sick one in my bathroom/bedroom who has been diagnosed with Feline Leukemia. It's so messy that I just don't know where to start to clean up. I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. Life is just too damn hard right now.

November 6, 2004
4:37 pm
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CAMER
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ok brendalee, howabout taking lil steps...maybe get up for about a 1/2 hour and clean just one room, then you can relax...Baby steps is a good way to do anything, then you are not so overwhelmed.

Why do you not see a future for yourself???

November 6, 2004
4:37 pm
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sdesigns
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Camer:Of course you can join in! I'm still trying to get Brenda up for it. Unless you want to stay home and watch TV (Ha, ha).Yeah life sucks sometime but at least there is still fattening gooey stuff to eat.

Brenda: Are you going to go outside today? Maybe walk around a bit, go look at some people? Cook a nice dinner? Bake some cookies? Come on girl, cheer up. SD

November 6, 2004
4:38 pm
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art angel
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brenda,
hang in there. just tackle one thing at a time. Start in one room and go from there, in regards to cleaning or whatever. Just be sure to take time for you too!

love and hugs,

art angel

November 6, 2004
4:41 pm
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CAMER
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brendalee...you have the support team banging at your door!!! come on out, get up and take a walk into another room, go outside for just a minute and breathe the fresh air..i think the more you lay down, the more you will get depressed.

Know that you are not alone!

November 6, 2004
4:47 pm
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sdesigns
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I had a cat that had that and it was so sad. I'm sorry for you and your kitty. You've got a plan for yourself today- cleaning. I always feel better when the house is clean although I don't necessarily like to be the one to do it. Like Camer said, just do a little to get started. Put on some great cleaning music on the stereo and dance while you're doing it, OK? SD

November 7, 2004
11:30 am
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brendalee
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I'll try. thanks all.

November 7, 2004
12:44 pm
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CAMER
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Brenda, just seeing how you are feeling today, did you do anything yesterday, maybe a walk outdoors or just getting the feet moving...hope you are ok

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