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Is it possible to have a possitive relationship with a recovering substance abuser?
May 8, 2001
12:06 pm
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Barbie
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September 27, 2010
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I have been involved for about a year and a half with a recovering substance abuser. During this time he has been in and out of recovery. He is currently in treatment for the next six months. I still love him deeply. I understand that he has a disease. However, I need to make a decision about my future with this person. I have been looking for information on how to heal the wounds that he has caused and how to decide if I should try "one more time". Is it possible to love and have a relationship with a recovering addict? How do I deal with family and social pressure to end this relationship?

May 8, 2001
2:11 pm
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Molly
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Its a very rough road, I am curious as to the substance, some are more likely to relapse than others, including the age that he first began using, I believe it makes a difference. Go to an Alanon meeting, just listen, these are the people that love substance abusers. You will live a life of fear, abscent of complete trust, it will be very difficult, also look at the whole picture, not just him, and your passion for him. this is your life, this is a big committment, and most would tell you to make him evidence sobriety for at least 2 years before getting into a relationship with him. If he is able to be sober, he will be a different person that whom you met. During the first two years, is tough so much they go through physically, mentally, emotionally. I know its hard, but ask why, and then look at you, why did you attract a substance abuser? If it was my daughter, I am sorry, but I would have to say run, heal, learn about you, stay away from men for 2 years, and then start over. Think long and hard, they are truly wonderful people, but they need to completely recover their stuff, it is truly easier for them with out the complications of love and trust of a s/o

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