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IS IT OVER ???
March 12, 2001
1:39 pm
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stones_dj
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September 29, 2010
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I have been dating a women for several years. When we meet we were both married and both had Kids. I was married to my high School sweetheatheart. She is older that I am she is 38 and I am 31. When we first meet at work it started out as friends, it seemd as though we could find major confort with each other and we could communicate well. she was married for 15 years and her ex-husband is an alcholic, and was very abusive (Physicaly and mentaly). Several months after we meet we were both divorced and wanted very much to be together. At first things were great other than dealing with a alcholic ex-husband. I feel I have been through with the things we have been through together nothing could rip us apart until now. It seems as though we are tearing each other down, we can communicate any more and it seems like nothing I do is right. She has become very cold and distant to me. It seems though she feels everything is my fault. However, their are times when we fight that I say mean and hurtful things before I realize what I am saying!! I don;t want to loose her but I think she needs help and she doesn't seem to want it, she claims to have tried. Anyways this a very long and complex relationship !! Any suggestions would be appriciated

March 12, 2001
7:24 pm
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Molly
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September 30, 2010
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Why don't you approach counseling from a different perspective. If you both hooked up right after your divorces, most likely you brought to this new relationship issues from the past, that still may need work. Abusive relationships for women take time to heal, I sincerely believe that there is a like PTSD that happens. It is also possible that you unknowingly played the role of rescuerer, and those are different dynamics than a normal (haha) healthy relationship. Hold on to the love.

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