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Is it my problem if I ejaculate prematurely or hers?
May 16, 2000
1:06 am
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BOBIE
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I been having this problem lately with my girl. I cum too fast and this is frustrating for me and I'm sure it is for her. Not only that, she does not feel me when I'm inside her. I have a 6 inch penis. This situation is affecting almost every aspect of my life...my carrer, my job, my life as a whole. Is there anything out there that could help me solve these problems? or is it just in my head? I have tried so many things within myself that I doubt it that is mental...definetly not physical. I need some help, this is really frustrating.

May 16, 2000
3:11 am
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hazza
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HI Bobie,
this is BOTH of your problem, there is no need to blame one person or the other.

Why not get some books and read up about ways to prelong the whole experience?

Also, the womens anatomy is designed that we have less nerve endings inside the vagina that we do around the opening. it is not abnormal at all that she cannot feel you inside her. it is the entry point that has all the feelings!!

it is far better that you both try to relax about this situation, it is not nearly so bad as you think, and why give yourselves performance anxiety? that would only make things worse.

try to enjoy what you are doing and not give yorusleves marks out of ten. and surley if you try again after it happens you will last longer anyway?

dont miss the whole point of lovemaking by focussing purely on technique, this is just making you anxious about it. You need to relax, read up and keep on having FUN!

dont let your own isecurities allow this problem to become an emotional one too, there is really no need. you are jusding yourself over it, find out practical things you can do to couter the situation instead.
Peace
Hazza

May 16, 2000
12:19 pm
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BOBIE
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May 16, 2000
12:24 pm
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BOBIE
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What if when I cum the first time I cannot go on the second. Come on I'm 23 years old, I should not have this kind of problem. I do enjoy sex with her and I think I like her too much and that's why I cum so fast. We don't rate each other, we have talk about it. She thinks I don't love her because I cum too fast, I think I love her too much.

May 16, 2000
8:59 pm
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janes
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It is a problem for both of you and no blame should be assigned.

There are many many many ways to pleasure your gal even if you have already ejaclated.

Twice? A night? sounds like you have watched too many movies. Life is not necessarily like that. Times in my life once a week....once a month...hurrah. and sometimes when the babies were all born...less.

Life and relationships is lots more than sex

May 16, 2000
9:23 pm
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Christie
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First of all........6 inches is average size. I don't know a lot about premature ejaculation but I believe it is attributed to excitement. And she needs to dump the idea about you not loving her enough because you cum too fast......that is totally irrational. You should look up some internet sites about pre-ejaculation...there may be something you can do about it.
AND........I agree with janes..........and also from personal experience that life and relationships are a lot more than sex. It is the relationship that makes the sex special ... NOT the other way around.

Maybe, for her sake and yours....
(this worked for someone I know)..you should let your mind wander a little bit once you start having sex...so you don't get so excited so quickly. This could prevent you from ejaculating so soon. I know this kind of goes against the grain of what sex is all about, but until you find something else to help, you could give it a try. Please don't blame yourself for this. Pre-ejaculation is not an uncommon problem and don't let her make you feel bad about yourself for it.
Good luck!!

May 16, 2000
9:53 pm
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what about de-sensitization sprays ?

May 17, 2000
2:26 am
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hazza
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Bobie,
You need to address the whole issue with your girlfriend of why whe is feeling so insecure, unfortunately she does need to work on that herself with your support of course.

It is Very NORMAL at your age to ejaculate quickly, because as you rightly say, you are excited and you do love her alot.

But the 2 of you need to read up the facts about this situation instead of retreating back into your own insecurities like you are doing.

No, sex is not the important thing, being happy with each other is. so if this is making you unhappy then find out all you can about this and why it happens and how to treat it. DOnt let it become a way for your insecurities to come out.
Peace
Hazza

May 18, 2000
12:22 pm
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Brenda
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Try tantric sex, it will help both of you and improve your sex life tremendously.

May 18, 2000
7:44 pm
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Bobie.

During sex, think about solving second order differential equations with three or more variables. Or solving for the unknowns in four by four matrices. It works every time. 🙂

May 19, 2000
2:56 am
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hazza
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Tez, Does your wife know about this! 🙂
Do you ever reach the answer?!!!
Haz

May 19, 2000
7:14 pm
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Hazza.

Yes. She thinks it's funny and at the same time she is appreciative. 🙂

Do I ever reach and answer? Never! I come before the answer does. 🙂

Hazza... your terible. 🙂

May 19, 2000
11:36 pm
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Dr. Ruth
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No, not THAT Dr. Ruth!

Your Dr. should be able to refer you to a clinic (eg. Diagnostic Center for Men) where they are trained for just this purpose. They have "training tapes" videos that demonstrate techniques for erectile longevity. I've seen them (strictly for research, of course) and they are educational, if slightly pornographic. There are other clinical solutions, too. You do not have to live with it, and you must not torment yourself over it. There are thousands of men in your age bracket who are being effectively treated, and so many more who are living miserable love lives. Unnecessary.

Tez, your figuring in your mind must factor in minding your wife's figure...

May 21, 2000
10:09 am
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hazza
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Tez,
My Boyfriend has just started a maths study course!!!!!!!

And i thought it was because he wanted to get his degree!!!!!

Now my mind is racing:)
Haz!

May 21, 2000
5:46 pm
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Hazza.

If the BF takes his calculator to bed, watch out! 🙂

Dr Ruth.

Hehehe. It's just that when my spurs puncture the water bed, its hard to remain hard. What am I doing wrong? 🙂

June 4, 2000
8:11 pm
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wespack
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