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Input please...about our reactions...gg
August 26, 2007
11:39 am
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ggfred4
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I would like some input as I am finding my thinking rather restrictive this a.m. According to one of Newton's laws, for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Does this pertain to science only?

I am thinking about people's reactions here. I keep hearing and thinking that we choose our feelings/reactions. No one else causes them. Yet, this doesn't align with Newton's laws??? If someone yells at us, there will be a reaction. Do we always have control over the reaction? That is what I would like to know. Could a reaction just be involuntary? I feel so confused.

August 26, 2007
12:37 pm
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Lisa Ann
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Very good question. I have learned over the past few months that I can not control my feelings or emotions to things that people say or do to me; however, I can control how I react to it. I have realized that if something upsets me or causes me anxiety, I need to take a time out and think hard about how I am feeling before I say or do anything.

So, based on my experience, I cannot control my emotions and feelings, but I have learned how to better react to them and not react on my emotions so quickly.

I hope that makes sense.

August 26, 2007
12:47 pm
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_anonymous
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gg- Newton is a law that pertains to physics. The physical science. Psychology is the study of the mind. It is not an exact science. We dont have control over our emotions. But we do have the ability to choose what words we want to say or if we wanted to use our legs and walk away or our hands to strike out, etc. A mature person has self control and can keep their feelings to themselves if they so choose. Or think things over and respond in a responsible fashion. For example I dare say it is universal for anyone to feel bad if another were to say to someone "you are stupid, and ugly and I wish you were dead" . A mature person who has self control and the intelligence to think might choose not to respond, or to walk away or to ask why the person felt that way. An impulsive, uncaring, person might hit the person in the mouth or call them foul names. How a person responds defines their character.

August 26, 2007
10:18 pm
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thedogsmom
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I agree with Lee Ann,

I think that with practice we can learn to have control over our reactions and by doing so we can control our emotions and feelings.

If we believe we are beautiful. ..if we truly believe that we are a good and beautiful person within..then even if somebody else tells us that we are ugly and they wish we would die... we would NOT believe their 'words' and we would therefore NOT feel bad about it.

"sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me"

When we let other people's opinions of us matter... we give them the power.. In reality.. another's opinion is only that.. "their" opinion.. it means nothing about who we really are. We give up our power ALL the time.. by letting others love for us or lack of love for us create feelings of insecurity or low self-esteem... but truly... IF we had self-esteem.. which only comes from the 'self'.. then thier choice of words could NEVER hurt us.

animals love us whether we have warts or pimples or bad breath...they love us based on how we treat them. If we are mean or angry or hurtful..they avoid us.. or hide or try to win our love....I wish we could be more like animals..

it takes practice. I am only learning this myself.
TDM

August 26, 2007
10:24 pm
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ggfred4
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Thank you LisaAnn, Destiny, and TDM for your words of wisdom. I appreciate your thoughts.

gg

August 26, 2007
10:49 pm
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horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
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GGfred, I wanted to take time here to say Hi! I also believe for me my reactions and attitude are the only things I have control over in my life. Everything else around me just seems to happen.........Your Friend, horsefly

August 26, 2007
11:09 pm
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ggfred4
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Hey horsefly, glad to hear from you. You said a lot in your statement, thanks!!! I also started the thread about my seesaw marriage, guess I was on a roll of despair today.

gg

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