
8:21 pm

September 24, 2010

Hi everyone. It has been awhile since I had first visited this site. It was a God send for me and I thank you all who were there for me at that time in my life. It was a complete mess then. I was almost at the end of my rope and almost didn't make it. I had lost everything and I mean everything.
Today, I can look back and say that it was a long journey but I made it. I don't feel the same way as I did then. Since then I have made progress in my career, new home, friends and now a relationship. Every aspect of my life has changed including me. At that time I swore I would never ever go through a mess like that again. I took care of me!!!
I have met a terrific guy who is intelligent, warm, caring, loving to his children, myself and my children. There is nothing this man can't do. My family loves him too.
Now...I am nervous. He has asked me to marry him. You see I live 2 hours away from him but we still commute back and forth if you can believe that. He wants me to move into his house with open arms to myself and children. Do you believe what you are reading? Scary isn't it? I guess when I think about the past it scares me. Why am I nervous? Well, that would mean, a new home, leave my job, uproot my children. I guess for one its the change. I do love this man but I wish he lived closer so that I wouldn't have to quit my job. I guess that gives me a form of security and I do really like my job. It is one that I have really worked hard for. He too has a very good job. The only difference is he is the boss of his own company and for marketing purposes and monetary reasons I don't think he should move. He is doing very well with his business. I will eventually move but it will really sadden me to leave my job. I look at life alot different these days and have matured in so many ways. I guess I am nervous about the big change in my life again. At least this is a good one but another new start. Life is too short to ponder on what if and should I. I am just nervous .....
Thanks for listening
Cerry
9:17 pm

September 24, 2010

9:36 pm

September 24, 2010

10:08 pm

September 30, 2010

How long has this fairy tale been going on? And congrats too by the way. Happiness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How about an engagement period? continue to feel the water?? I know it is so hard to go through another change for you and the kids, and now that you have the job, and are independent, and somewhat settled, I wonder if your totally prepared for the BRADY BUNCH and all the problems that is created by blending families. I am not by any means trying to rain on your parade, but cautiously giving you reasons to validate your nervousness. Do not even consider to move in, until the vows are spoken, I will take a stand on that one. Sorry
9:53 pm

September 24, 2010

Thanks Molly,
When it comes to the brady bunch, I guess i came from that type of invironment. I have met his children and we do go on outings. Actually they are very well behaved and funny, treat me like a mom. Very well behaved and honour students. The nervousness i guess stems back to when I devoted my life to a man whom I thought at the time was, "the one" for me. That was the worst time of my life. I could live through anything but that was the most horrific time in my life. I never felt that bad in my life before. I at one time wanted to die but I am here to tell you I didn't. Its amazing how one person can make you feel; so bad that you wanting to kill yourself. Oh God, "the thought of it makes me nervous". I had to live again and did say at that time, never again would I let anyone get close to me. My mother told me when I least expect it I would meet someone. I didn't believe her.. Well, I did.. and it was not bad at first. Now that it is more serious, I am not going commit totally until I am sure. Just thinking of it makes me nervous. I guess it is an indication that I will have to take things real slow. I guess with all traumas the memory is always there...if you know what I mean?
Thanks
Cerry
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