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im a mess/social anxiety/prob in counselin
July 29, 2001
2:01 pm
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shugarmagnolya
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September 27, 2010
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i seem to have all these deep-seated emotional issues. although i seem to be all put together on the outside, im falling apart on the inside. i dont know where to start. im stressed over school/my love life/financial issues/who i am/goals in life etc. I find myself withdrawing alot, very sensitive, so sensitive that im afraid of doing things because i dont know if I could handle it if I failed. I have so much going for me right now...doing well in school, just got a poem i wrote published, etc. but all this other stuff is weighing me down. I revolve eveything i do around whether or not im comfortable around the people i will be with...is that so wrong? I try to keep myself in environments of low stress and people that i like to be around. But im often scared of people, like im afraid theyll find out im not a very interesting person or that im not very intelligent. I guess i have very low self-esteem but how do you gain more self-esteem. Im tired of being in therapy and talking about things. I think about stuff so much that talking about things only helps for a good five minutes and then I wonder "HOW!". How do i feel better? How do i increase my self-esteem? How can i feel more comfortable around others? And how does knowing the heart of my problems help me to feel better?

July 29, 2001
6:04 pm
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damaged
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I think anyone who just got a poem published and is doing good in school is a very intelligent person. I can relate to much of what you are saying here. My self-esteem also has suffered most of my life. What is helping for me is saying sober and doing things I have wanted to do for years. One of the main things that has helped is to start to like me and stop putting so much time into what everyone else things about me. And another thing that I thing helpes is to write it out like you have here about how your feeling. Keep posting!!!! Damaged

July 29, 2001
9:52 pm
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LilyBart
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September 24, 2010
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Hi,

I can relate to what you're feeling - while reading your post, I could feel my worries, my anxieties and my troubles to be a "fairly normal person". I had a hard time in just identifying what I feel, and that is basically what you wrote above.I can't tell I'm 100% OK now, but what gives me the strenght to go on with my life is the hope that in most situations I can be just myself and things won't turn out so dawn terrible as I thought(I don't know if you can understand it, I'm kinda confused in English).
Well, that's it from me. Please feel free to write, it makes things seem less hard when we know the problem we have is not exclusively our own.
LilyBart.

July 31, 2001
2:06 pm
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malaikau
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September 24, 2010
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Based on what you've written I see a person who is smart, sensitive, tenacious, capable, stubborn, and introspective. You seem to know what you are doing and why. You seem willing to look inside yourself and ask yourself the tough questions--the kind of questions that will lead you on a path of learning and growth. I know it's easier for me to see these qualities in you than it is for you to recognize them in yourself. That's one of life's paradoxes, it seems.

Learning to see your strengths is the beginning of building your self esteem. Think of a person you love deeply. I'm sure you are able to love this person faults and all. We are all a beautiful balance of weakness and strengths. But we all seem to have a tendancy to focus on our weaknesses, and use them to invalidate our strengths. Perhaps changing perspectives, and recognizing strengths will give you the ability to love yourself as a whole person. Then you can change the things you don't like--if they are within your power to change. Maybe an easier goal would be to love yourself just the way you are. . . I imagine your friends and family do!

Sincerely,

Mal

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