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I want to change yet my mind and body seem to do want different things!
March 22, 2007
9:22 am
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lewis
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hi

i feel that i am at the end of my road, i hate my life, i have nothing in it, i want to change yet i seem to be in slow motion?

how can life get this crap?

what makes it worse is that i gave up smoking recently and now i feel depressed there is nothing to comfort me!!!

please help me make changes, i hate me, i hate my life, i have no one , i feel that i have made a complete mess of my life and i don't know how to change it??

šŸ™

March 22, 2007
12:38 pm
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Rasputin
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Hi Lewis,

Yep I remember you posting a thread about giving up smoking. Congrats!!! That's a huge step in the right direction!

Start baby steps by setting up short term goals and reward yourself each time you do them.

Hon remember change is NOT easy and it's natural that your body and mind are reacting.

For instance...if you give up smoking, keep yourself busy with something else....learn knitting, read or purchase a good book to keep you busy from smoking.

Develop your spiritual life. There is a good book by Rick Warren entitled "The purpose driven life". Have you given it a shot?

Every day simple baby steps will head you in the right direction.

Blessings {{{Sweet Lewis}}}, Ras~

March 22, 2007
12:50 pm
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revelation
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Well, for starters you need to quit beating yourself up and being so hard on yourself. You simply CANNOT change into the ideal version of yourself overnight...and you CANNOT do it without making at least one mistake...so go gentle on yourself, expect to make mistakes, expect to feel down sometimes, keep focussed on your path and do not be persuaded by the gremlins in your head to believe all the negative self-talk you keep feeding yourself.

Also remember that just like everyone you know, you are human...none of us is perfect, none of us can be happy all of the time, none of us can be expected not to make mistakes or go down the road sometimes, stop expecting perfection from yourself all the time...you are being terribly unfair to yourself if you are!

You have given up smoking, something which I so far have failed to do...why aren't you patting yourself on the back for that? Whether you stay off them or not, you are off them now and thats more than a lot of people can do....start to appreciate some of those good things about yourself instead of focussing all the time on the negatives!!! We'd hate EVERYONE if we only focussed on the negatives about them!

Rev.

March 22, 2007
2:32 pm
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lewis
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thankyou Rasputin, 'Rick Warren entitled "The purpose driven life". ' I will look it up and give it a read.
' Baby Steps' I will bear them in mind too.

thankyou revelation, all of what you are both saying is true and thanks for your input. I know i sound moany and here is the fav word, 'but' I have NEVER felt this low! I think I'm at a turning point, my heart is SO sad my mind is reminding me of the rewards that I will receive if i do this and i do that to get on and change.

I have to do something!!! why is my body and heart preventing me from moving forward.

I so want to smoke, but i won't because it dosen't make me feel any better, it makes me feel crap!

March 22, 2007
6:15 pm
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revelation
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Lewis, its quite plain to see that you are moving forward...its just not happening fast enough for that little perfectionist in your head. She's in my head to but I've gotten better at ignoring her and life is just so much more bright and breezy now! You really need to work on that negative thinking hun!

yes again you put yourself down in your post calling your self "moany"....you have every right to feel like crap, why go beat yourself up about it?

You want to smoke but you haven't...honestly I am in total and complete admiration for you...and in the long run, you are doing so much good for yourself!

Try this. Look in the mirror and say "I am not a smoker" over and over again until it starts to sound true. I know a man who gave up by doing this every morning.

March 23, 2007
11:21 am
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lewis
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thanks revelation i will do the mirror thing I read a book about something like that it said look in the mirroe and sat 'I am ready to change'.
I'm happy that i'm a non smoker now, its that part of my life life that I have been able to change, yet it is true that smoking is a symptom I smoked for comfort and because I have this black hole feeling in my soul.
I have no answers I sometimes feel that I'm not getting anywhere because I lack an essential ingredient, that other people seem to have. I'm getting older, I'm single, I have one mate, I rely too much on my parents. I am not happy with me. šŸ™

I'm sorry maybe in a day or two my mood will brighten šŸ™‚

March 23, 2007
12:39 pm
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lewis
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i really should read b4 i post!!!

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