.....of the plans I have for my future. Through tears and sniffles, I told him everything I thought he could digest in one phone call. I told him I was going back to my therapist I told him that I couldn't live with his addiction anymore and that I was affraid to talk to him for fear of his anger. I told him that I still loved him but I no longer liked him. I told him everything that has been stirring around in my head for the past year. At first he was defensive, then he got angry, then he got silent and distant then he got scared. That was the part I liked best because his fear said to me that he knew I was dead serious....and I was. Of course, I waited until he was gone away again to tell him all of this. I had planned to tell him on the weekend but I chickened out- didn't want to spend the weekend fighting. As cowardly as it was, I think it was easier on the phone- for both of us. He panics when he sees me cry and I cry at the drop of a hat. I cry when I hear bag pipes for god sakes. Highly emotional but nonetheless, I know how I want to feel and I am not liking who I am right now. YAY ME! I feel a huge weight lifted from my shoulders. Thank you for all of your writings and encouragement. You have inspired my to make my move. Freya.