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I talk to myself
July 31, 2001
5:16 pm
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kafka
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I'm around 30 or so now. I've been talking to myself-out loud-ever since I can remember. probably 3 years old. Nobody knows about it. Not mom. Dad. My wife... nobody. Well, maybe my dog, but that's it. Does that mean I'm weird? Am I going to die? Am I a psychological mess or maybe just genuis? I do it because I like to. I'd rather talk out load than suppressed somewhere in the back of my brain. I feels better? Seriously, does that make me a freak of nature? Just wondering... a friend I confided in told me it means I'm genius but I feel as stupid as the next guy...

July 31, 2001
6:03 pm
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kafka
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Seriously guys, I'm not trying to be funny here! I suppose I just type how I talk... Very casual. But seriously, if someone talks to themselves out loud what's it mean? Could it be that perhaps I am depressed because I don't have many friends to talk to so I just settle for talking to myself instead? I'm somewhat of a recluse... I'm a writer... an aspiring one anyway... I'm beginning to think I'm depressed because life has been boring and uneventful. My wife is my best friend and we get along great but we haven't had sex in months (can I say "sex" here? I hope so!... if not I'll refer to it as "whoopee" in my next passage). the weird part of it is, it's been "okay" with me, as sexually charged a person as I am. It's never been okay before, and now suddenly I can go months without it. What am I, a camel?! Taking backpacking trips brings me joy and I try to get out and do as many of them as I can year around, but as soon as I get home I feel dragged. My career has floundered. I feel like a loser and that the world is against me because I suck. And in the end, the only friend I can rely on--beside my trusty German shepherd dog "Rommel"--is my own conscience. It talks to me and tells me, "come on dude, don't be a wuss!", "toughen up man!... Rome wasn't built in a day... you'll find your mark soon enough...". But in the end, I just feel like I just plain suck, even when I know I might not suck but just lack any degree of luck or a break once in a while... if that makes any sense. Anyway, it would be nice to get someone else's take on my situation. I'm new here. I don't know where I'm going. I don't know what I'm doing. Maybe the root of the problem begins at Page 1. Why do I talk to myself? Is there a reason?

July 31, 2001
8:11 pm
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Molly
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We talk to our selves the entire time we are awake, you just started to do it out loud, amazing though, I am a wanna be writer, told I was a genious, and pretty stuck my self, my german shepherd/Lab, has learned to talk back to me, now what is scarey, is that he makes sense. Not to make fun of you, I am dead serious. Those on the threads know about all of this, and perhaps due to a lack of social interaction, we communicate here, always a friend. You can only say so much to your S/O best friend or not, sound sorta like a loner, so personally I guess your ok, but then again, do we have a problem?
Not, its when we hear some one else talk to us that there is a problem, right??? Maybe a career change, radio, or 900 number, put that conversation to work.

August 1, 2001
10:06 am
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silence
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you're not alone at all man. I've talked to myself my whole life. I know members of my family hear it somtimes. It embarasses me whenever I walk into the next room and see my mother or father sitting there. Then I try to recall everything I just said when I was in the other room. It's tough. I'll give you that much. I don't know much in the, "how do I cope with it" department. My only advice is to try not to do it when other people are around. But you seem to already be doing that better than me.

August 1, 2001
10:29 am
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malaikau
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Maybe it's just a way of reminding yourself that just because you're alone doesn't mean you have to be lonely. You must be really great company!

Mal

August 1, 2001
11:52 am
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gingerleigh
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I find that speaking out loud when alone, or laughing out loud if the mood strikes makes me feel more genuine and "real". I think that all of us are constantly "talking" to ourselves, just in our heads. If you are alone, there is absolutely no reason not to vocalize it, right?

No, talking to yourself doesn't make you crazy. 🙂 In fact, I think it's a good sign that you are using yourself to pump yourself back up with the little cheers and encouragements. (So much better than needing another person to do it for you!)

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