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I just want to cry
September 3, 2007
7:15 am
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moonkissed
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September 24, 2010
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...and I cant. I feel so numb, like I cant feel...it's so very scary. I'm the type that cries over sappy AT&T and Hallmark commercials. Now nothing.

I want my emotions back ... I've been trying to detach from a situation and I feel as if I've detached from myself...Lost

Sometimes in my life I have felt I hold all my emotions in because if they came out it would be too overwhelming. Now I feel as if I have nothing to come out.

... Am I losing touch with me.

September 3, 2007
8:06 am
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September 29, 2010
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I see you posting here, so - to me - that means you're connected to you (or trying to).

in what ways do "you" - the person you are - resemble your situation (the situation you've been trying to detach from)?

September 3, 2007
8:08 am
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jastypes
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I can really relate to that. I've been learning to "feel my feelings" again just recently. Mostly, I don't think have time for that crap! But when I don't take time, those feelings usually come out when I least expect it or want it -- like when I'm at work.

I am learning to find safe places to feel my feelings -- at recovery meetings; at church; alone in my bed.

I'm on an upswing right now, but just last week I was feeling absolutely miserable. I cried in church and talked to some people in order to get my feelings out. I have to FORCE myself to do that now.

I completely understand the feeling of losing touch with yourself. It means you have to reconnect with yourself. Schedule time just for you. Be a little selfish. Journaling is a great tool.

September 3, 2007
8:09 am
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jastypes
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I can really relate to that. I've been learning to "feel my feelings" again just recently. Mostly, I don't think have time for that crap! But when I don't take time, those feelings usually come out when I least expect it or want it -- like when I'm at work.

I am learning to find safe places to feel my feelings -- at recovery meetings; at church; alone in my bed.

I'm on an upswing right now, but just last week I was feeling absolutely miserable. I cried in church and talked to some people in order to get my feelings out. I have to FORCE myself to do that now.

I completely understand the feeling of losing touch with yourself. It means you have to reconnect with yourself. Schedule time just for you. Be a little selfish. Journaling is a great tool.

September 3, 2007
10:37 am
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euqcaj
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September 27, 2010
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Hi Moon, True, & Jas,....
Your posts ring a bell with me.
I have difficulty with obsessing over things,...repeating in my mind what was said, did I say the right thing, what could I have said differently to make the other person love me more,.....or to make them feel better,..and on and on,....

I repeat the conversations in my head over and over. Maybe it's a way to stay in touch with the ones I love, but I know it's not healthy and it is a burden when I really look at what I'm doing.

If something doesn't flow quite right in a phone conversation or other get together, I feel like it's my fault and I try to think of what I could have said differently,...I guess to "fix" it.

With loved ones, I'm that way. With other people that just disgust me, or agitate me, I get angry inside. I always try to act tactfully, but I'm notagonizing over these people. I ache when it comes to my loved ones. Especially my youngest daughter and my granddaughter. I think it has to do with they are the only family I have left. Everyone else is either dead or estranged. Very sad.

I have had that feeliing of wanting to cry and can't. I also am very sentimental and cry over romantic and loving things,.....but when it comes to things that might cause me pain,...then the tears are difficult.

Hope you can have a few moments when you can realize why you want to cry,...and then just bawl into your pillow.
Jacque

September 3, 2007
5:23 pm
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Anonymous
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September 24, 2010
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I can remember never being able to cry unless I was in a theraphy session...only time till recently actually when a very horrible event triggered ptsd for me. When I was on Paxil, I was numb, and I had no emotions at all, and then i got off of them and was weepy again...would be nice for a middle ground in life, but abuse in my life, made that just about impossible for me here.

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