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I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO SCARED IN MY LIFE--PLEASE PRAY FOR MY BF!!!--loverbee
June 26, 2006
11:43 pm
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loverbee
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Ok, so tonight, my bf left his backpack in the back of a cab. HE didn't get the medallion number and the backpack contained marijuana and coke. Please pray for him everyone. If the backpack gets turned into the police and they search it he is screwed. Please please please pray for him. Also, if the backpack doesn't get turned in at all, he has lost his mac computer and all the music he has ever written. Please pray that this ends up ok. Please.

June 26, 2006
11:55 pm
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loverbee
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Please pray for him. Please pray for him. Please pray for him.

June 26, 2006
11:57 pm
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LthrNlace
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I will pray that everything turns out for him. Have faith it will turn out the way it is suppose to. You and him are in my prayers tonight.

June 27, 2006
12:31 am
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loverbee
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Does anyone know the drug laws for NYC?

June 27, 2006
12:32 am
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loverbee
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He had a little bit of coke on him and a bit of pot. Its not that big a deal and the whole reason he has it is cause he never does it. So what would happen if they found that?

June 27, 2006
12:34 am
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cpt1212
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i would suppose a good defense would that the backpack was out of his possesion and so it could have been put in there by anyone.

June 27, 2006
12:38 am
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loverbee
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Do you think they would do a huge thorough search of the back pack even after they found the perscription meds with his name on them. Would they just call and tell him they found the backpack without going any further?

June 27, 2006
12:39 am
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jewel
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I will pray for him.

June 27, 2006
1:03 am
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Jenni
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LB, I'm a little confused about the part where you said the reason he has it is because he never does it.

June 27, 2006
1:27 am
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sewunique
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Loverbee

What do you mean; "it's no big deal"

Im' sorry, but I am not too sympathetic here. These drugs are illegal, esecially the crack.

If he isn't using, then why does he even have it in his possession? Just to be cool? Way not cool.

Call it "holding" or "possession is 9/10ths of the law.

I do not do drugs and am not that familiar, but I DO KNOW these are illegal. and coke?

My prayers are that you both will come to the reality of what this is all about. It is not about whether or not he 'will caught doing something wrong'.

It is about realizing these drugs are wrong, addictive and illegal. That is where my prayers will be placed. Loverbee, it IS a BIG DEAL.

I hope you both discuss this and come to some healthy choices about this stuff.

I am talking straight from the hip here to you because I feel it is not something to just brush away with excuses. This is serious stuff you are involved with here.

Hugs,

Sew

June 27, 2006
1:35 am
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sewunique
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Forget about NYC laws.

Controlled substances is under the U.S. Federal Law.

http://www.dea.gov/pubs/abuse/chart.htm

Even the lesser drugs I administer to my patients by a doector's order is all regulated under the FEDERAL Government of US.

June 27, 2006
5:43 am
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revelation
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Hi Loverbee,

Sorry if this causes any offence, but I'm actually not going to pray for him, I'm going to pray for you...that you have the strength to distance yourself from someone who's obviously very unhealthy and messed up.

Rev.

June 27, 2006
7:09 am
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loverbee
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YOU KNOW you are all really judgemental. The reason he has them is that has had the backpack for about six years now. thats a long time and yes, he should have cleaned it out but he went to rehab and has been clean for seven years now and has now gotten himself a great job and a dream. SO NO HE IS NOT MESSED UP!!! I asked him why he still carried it around and he told me that he had forgotten about it until he lost the backpack. You can say that is a load of crap but he gets drug tested every week and has always come up negative. So hold your judgements, he regrets it and that is all he can do. He too thought that it was a lesson. And you know what else, you talk about an addict as if they are a bad person. Lets just say he was an addict and having a hard time, does that make him unworthy of love? I would hope not or else in that frame of mind, I think there are a lot of people on this site who we should not be helping. But i think that if they are struggling, then that makes them deserve the help all the more. I don't turn my back on people because they have had problems. I hope you all learn to do the same too.

June 27, 2006
7:09 am
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Robert123
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Somebody is getting a life lesson. How would a person pray for this? That the boyfriend gets his backpack back and no one asks any questions? So then he continues doing what he is doing. Or that he gets caught and has to face his addiction and maybe gets some help?

June 27, 2006
7:13 am
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loverbee
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I JUST SAID HE IS NOT ADDICTED ANYMORE!!! HE HA S BEEN CLEAN FOR SEVEN YEARS AND STILL GETS DRUG TESTED!!! YOU KNOW WHAT, FORGET I SAID ANYTHING! I don't know if I want to be around a site that a) doesnt't listen
b)jumps to conclusions about a persons personality and c) wishes harm upon the people in need of help.

June 27, 2006
7:22 am
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loverbee
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oh and by the way, all I want is for this to scare him into throwing them away (because he should have and he knows that) but going to jail over something that happened in the past would be a bad thing. He doesn't need that. Not to mention the fact that in reality he is more upset about the fact that all the lyrics he has ever written were in the backpack so I will pray that he gets them back since many people here seem too judgemental to help me.

June 27, 2006
7:32 am
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loverbee
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and sew, you were so supportive but now you just sound closed minded and judgemental. If he were still doing the drugs, then that would be a big deal but he isn't so he just needs to learn to clean everything out. I have been with him almost 24.7 for the last year because we live together and he plays a lot of guitar but I haven't seen him doing any drugs. so I am proud of him for that and I am nnot going to wish harm on him just because he is a little careless and forgot to clean out a six year old backpack that he used for the first time in six years and forgot about it.

June 27, 2006
8:26 am
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smarterone
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Loverbee. I really think given the fact that it is not on his person, there is nothing they could do about it. I know the value though of losing lyrics, poems, etc, that you have worked so hard on and every line has a life meaning. Good luck

June 27, 2006
8:32 am
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loverbee
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Ok, so turns out that the day that he went to rehab seven years ago, his mother cleaned everything out and there is a good chance that he wasn't carrying anything afterall. Nothing has been turned in though and that means that he has lost all his lyrics and the computer that he recorded his first song compilations on. That is what he is really upset about. However, the good news is that he has a few of the recordings backed up. I am proud of him for not going to pieces over it. His response was "it will make for a good song." Now I understand the concern that peoople had about keeping illegal drugs but I think the worst part was that the only reason that he thought he had them on him was because he found the backpack in his parents storage and it didn't even occur to him to check for the drugs he had done seven years ago. Thank god his mother cleaned it all out. It was painful for her to have to face that but at the same time, he is clean now and that is all that matters. The reason I got so upset is that I thought you all were condemning him for being an addict when he has been clean for so long. He is like a whole different person now. And we are best friends so I would know if he were doing drugs. That and the fact that he still gets tested a lot by his parents. I am glad it is ok now though and since I haven't slept, I am going to catch some z's.

June 27, 2006
8:33 am
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readyforachange
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(((loverbee))) Has he tried to call the cab company? Even if he doesn't have the number of the cab, they may have a general lost and found for items lieft in their cabs. It is worth a try. I seriously doubt that they attempt to search through every item left in a cab and attempt to find its rightful owner...that would just be too difficult a job. Hang in there...

June 27, 2006
10:43 am
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Jenni
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LB, the point was that even IF he was still an addict, the response you got was still appropriate. Because sometimes, the true way to help someone, is to NOT help them, believe it or not.

I was married to an addict, who in turn, did five years in prison for manufacturing meth! If he HADN'T gone to prison, he would have never gotten the true help that he needed.

And, I would like to add, that during this time, he was NEVER hated!! Infact, he was loved, just in a tough love sort of way. He's been clean now for over six years, and is actually a productive memeber of society.

But SOMETIMES, that is what it takes to get to a better place. And I don't view that as a BAD thing. He had to go thru some hard times to get where he is now. But without those times, he'd never be where he is now.

And even though we are divorced, we are still close. AND he has learned so much from his experience that he has even spoken at high school assemblies about the dangers of drugs. And he's also, now, trying to "help" our daughter, who may be in some trouble of her own, and require some of the same things her father went thru.

Judgemental? NO!! REAL?? YES!! There are many forms of love, and sometimes, love isn't "easy".

It's possibly true that your BF was just indeed careless, and is clean, as you say. But, the initial post came off as he had drugs on him, and you didn't want him to be caught. You left out the part about his recovery and why the drugs were with him to begin with. So naturally, it was assumed that he was still in trouble. And if he were, the responses here were called for.

Sorry, but this thread struck a nerve with me, because I've been there, done that, and possibly THERE again!!

Best wishes to you and your BF.

Jen

June 27, 2006
12:20 pm
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taj64
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I offer my support because I think it must have been hard on you to become so defenseful and get knocked down. When you first read the post it does not appear obvious that these drugs had been in there a long time. But I do worry because you became very defenseful and allowed others on the thread to get to you. I think the past few days have been too stressful for you especially since the police officer accuses you of something you didn't do. Please calm down and don't let judgment stand in your way. Im sure you BF had every intention of not having illegal stuff and you know him best at this time in his life. So it is important to trust your own instincts. I know I am guilty of jumping the guns on some of the threads as well, since I didn't always get the whole story. It is hard in cyber world to help others when you don't have all the facts. It is good to recognize this when you make this mistake and also good to correct if you know this. I hope you are having a better day than yesterday, cause it was tough day all around for you. take care, TAJ

June 27, 2006
12:33 pm
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smarterone
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Glad to see that it is turning out for the best.

June 27, 2006
12:49 pm
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revelation
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Ummmm....sorry but I didn't judge you Loverbee...not in my post anyway, and I can't see anyone else who did either....All I said is that I would pray that you have the strength to let go of someone who's unhealthy and messed up...I make no apology for that LB, because your first thread said he was carrying around a backpack with drugs in it...whether the drugs were for his consumption or not is irrelevent, someone who's carrying around illegal drugs for whatever reason is messed up. OK, so later you went on to explain that he has had them in the backpack for 7 years and forgot about them....OK. So, he's had this backpack for 7 years, carrying his laptop in it, which he uses to write songs, so obviously he uses this backpack quite a lot...and in all that time, he's forgotten about these drugs...then all of a sudden he leaves the backpack somewhere and Ta-da his memory returns...sorry LB, but this sounds like BS...I'm only human, I'm no demi-god and as another human being I am telling you honestly that that really sounds like a crock to me. Perhaps it isn't you know him, you obviously trust him...good for you.

So your quote:
"YOU KNOW you are all really judgemental" is untrue...I'm not "really" judgemental, just a little judgemental...every human on earth is a judgemental to some degree...

Thank you,
Rev.

June 27, 2006
1:16 pm
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sewunique
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Loverbee

I know you are angry with me, but it would not be fair to you to not have said what I did ro you in all honesty.

And in being honest, after reading so many posts here that were giving you support in the manner you wanted was not right in my head and heart. So my post turned the other way. But what I wrote was still supportive.

First, you did not share the entire information. It just did not add up. Either you are naive or in denial.

Bottom line here, your boyfreind should know ...if he has been in rehab and his parents drug test him weekly, that this is serious and it is wrong for him to have drugs in his possession.

He suddenly recalls he is carrying drugs around in an old backpack? I do not beleive it. But given the benefit of doubt, then perhaps he has been in denial all these years and kept this drug stashed away for security, and when the backpack is lost, he suddenly recalls he had saved some drugs all these years.

It doesn't add up. Perhaps you can stand back from this picture and ask a few quesstions, then ask your boyfriend to be honest with yuo and himself.

Seven years he holds some drugs and never tempted to use, tho he has been in rehab yet his parents still have drug tested him because they apparently do not trust, he forgot he had the drugs until the backpack is lost.........all these are hard, honest questions to ask for you and to ask him.

If I was to say I would pray for the safe return of his backpack and not to have the drugs found, as you asked here.....that would not be honest support here from me or us. that would be called 'enabling' and not be fair to avoid seeing the proble as it is.

You have recieved some great responses here after you got upset with everyone. Please take to heart what has been said.

Again, I would never carry drugs on me, it is illegal. Anyone who carries drugs on them, knows this, for them to sweep it away and say they are not using the drug is still wrong and denial, because using or not, carrying them is wrong. Period. It is the law.

So I am being supportive in the right manner, with a caring heart for you and trying to get you to see the whole picture here and to get real about this.

Hugs,

Sw

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