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i feel like I am going crazy-Jewel
March 12, 2007
12:29 am
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katarina
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get off of all the pills. check into a hospital to save your life.

March 12, 2007
1:07 am
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Anonymous
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(((Jewel))) Pain can lead us to desperation which can lead us to the meds box, can´t it? It turned out to be a good thing you went to the ER before overdoing on meds. You managed this crisis well. I hope you feel better.

March 12, 2007
4:34 pm
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addicts wife
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(((((((((((((Jewel))))))))))
I have to say, as a female person who deals with chronic pain, depression and anxiety trhat pain can do all kinds of things to yur mentality, and exteem. having had a debilitatingdisese and a few conditions added to this myself, I have built up a tolerance to certain meds, refused taking anything non homeopathic/natural for years, I was afraid of chemicals and addiction, but now that i am 35, and have been taking prescribed meds for the stuff I have they do help, IF taken properly and having to be very aware if something new happens physically. Like when my tailbone was first broken/bruised, I got anxiety and was in huge excessive pain, but I had to mentally run throuhg everything in mymental list of conditions thinking: a) did I just hurt an existing condition?
B) Did I remember to take my pain/ antiinflamatory meds?
C) did I take my antidepressants/mood stabilizers?
D) what happened tocause new pain? In this case i knew i fell, but was it just exacerbating an old condition or do I need the ER/x-rays etc??
E) Thinking of all these things alone can give me anxiety from he**!!! okaaay, b-r-e-a-t-h-!!!!

I mean it's really bad too when you go t oa doctor and they scratch their heads and can't give you a diagnosis and send you to a specialist who does the same thing, then i started wondering IF there really was something wrong with me until one doc did the righttests and validated ALL my concerns and pain!! it's enough tomake a woman wiht PMS issues fee llike she's lost her sane/rational mind, especially when we've got a BIG event planned and now nerves about being on the wrong meds, let alone the wrong amount!!
YIKES!
And sometimes, we(people in general) really need otfind a better docotr, some refuse to prescribe anything, some will insist on keeping you on a med that is clearly causing the side effects listed on my bag when i pick them up! And some jsut probably should retire!

I know you mentoned you dont want to tell your fiance whatis happening because you dont want him to fee lburdened, but hunny, if you can't tell your husband, that concerns me! I didnt want ot tel J a lot of my pain/aches/anxiety issues because i felt like i was alwyas complaining, but he said "Hunny, I will be here when you're too old andstiff to get offthe toilet by yourself, I LOVE you,and amhere to help, you are not a burden, and I dont think you're complaining." I pictured myself as the wife who only complained and pictured him dreading asking me how my day was because it was always negative. not that it was, but it's how I felt.but letting him know wasmore beneficial, because it explained some timeswhen I was distant from pain, he was thinking it was something he said or did, got swensitive becasue i was irritated(wiht my own body, not him or "us"
Im kinda blabbering, but just really wanted you to know I am thinking of you, am sincerely concerned and hoping you are feeling better today!!!
((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

March 12, 2007
4:34 pm
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jewel
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THe same doc is prescribing them, but I am not suppossed to be mixing them which I have. I don't know what's wrong with me. I do the stupidest things when depressed. I am sorry for scaring you careless. I don't think I am going to be doing anything like that anytime soon.

March 12, 2007
4:34 pm
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addicts wife
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P.S. Thank you SO much for the AW's wedding thread!!1 It made my day!!1 you are a sweetheart!!!!

March 12, 2007
6:54 pm
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jewel
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My pleasure AW. You deserve some special attention since you are getting married. That is a very happy time. I am nervous about my wedding, but I get nervous about going to the dentist and doctors too. It is just in my personality. I wish that I could just get rid of some of the nervousness and let it go.

Jewel

March 13, 2007
10:02 am
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Randomwomen2
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with the meds I was on it lowered my blood presure so I was light headed a lot and seeing things unfortunatly is apart of bipolar disorder. I get it all the time yes its scary but youll get through it. I am actualy doing with out meds right now and I seem to be alright. (((Jewel))) I hope that this gets better for you

March 13, 2007
2:12 pm
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jewel
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Thanks random. Maybe I am not so crazy after all. I have a lot going on right now.

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