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I fall for those in recovery..WHY?
March 2, 2004
3:26 am
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Tiptoe
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September 30, 2010
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Hello to you all, just found this site... do I ever "Fell the Love" quickly added this to favorites. What brought me out searching for help, I just realized I am always falling for the guys that are in alcohol recovery. Its like alcohol has taken away so much from my life that anyone strong enough to control it is so appealing to me. Then, alas I find myself right back in the old Codependent cycle of bending over backwards to please. The worst is taking the verbal abuse of never quiet being good enough, and I realize this is an alcoholic tendency to make others feel bad so they feel better of themselves. Any advice on this one? I really need HELP

March 2, 2004
1:02 pm
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angel1
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September 24, 2010
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Hey Tiptoe..I don't think theres anything wrong with dating someone in recovery if you are ready to involve yourself with someone..but if your just starting out in recovery and so is the other person..its like the blind leading the blind..it takes time for each person to grasp the program..and we need time to build ourselves up..I have been in recovery for about 12 years and I still have so far to go when it comes to working on me..it has taken me awhile to feel like I can share my life with another person..I have dated but about 2 yrs ago I got married and we have our struggles and its not easy to give so much of me and in a relationship thats what you do give and take..I have to remember to continue working on me..that is where I need to focus...then everything else will fall into place for me..I'm grateful to understand this today...Angel1

March 2, 2004
2:43 pm
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Tumbleweed8
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September 27, 2010
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I agree Angel1. I think it is difficult to determine between wanting to caretake someone again or knowing when its okay to give and take. I catch myself about to do things sometimes, then decide no, that would just be caretaking again. I think I'm having trouble with this still.

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