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I ENDED IT ONCE, I CAN AND WILL DO IT AGAIN!! :)
May 29, 2007
2:08 pm
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santino
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I was reading my Codependant, No more book. (I'm addicted!)

I see so many similarities, it's scary! 🙂
I have come to realize that I'm not Superman!! I can't save everyone who needs help from me. Directed at my ex who broke contact after 4 months, she only calls me when she needs something. I always feel obligated to help her. I make excuses to help her. It hurts like the devil to hear how shes moved on, and I endure the pain for her. I disregard my own feelings and emotions to satify her!

I'm Codependant! No More. From now on, I'm gonna put the work in, and start focusing on my life! I'm gonna be selfish when it comes to my feelings. If it hurts to talk to her then I wont do it. I thought that I wanted to be her friend, but I realized friendship doesn't come with that type of pain. It shouldn't hurt to be friends with someone!

She only calls me at work. She never gives me her number or even offers to help me! This is a one sided affair. I'm being used! She has the best of both worlds, NO MORE! NOT AT THE EXPENSE OF MY FEELINGS! SHE'S GONNA HAVE TO FIND A NEW PUPPET TO DANCE FOR HER! I ENDED IT ONE, I CAN AND WILL DO IT AGAIN!

From now on, it's all about me and my kids, like "Lovinglife" told me, GOOD FATHER= CHICK MAGNET 🙂 TThose are the types of people I want to attract, the people who appreciate me for who I am, and what I have to offer! 🙂

Thanks for reading, just had a burst of good energy!! 🙂

May 29, 2007
2:12 pm
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ggfred4
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WOW! Santino! I am proud of you. Just admitting all of that is a step forward. Congrats!

gg

May 29, 2007
2:13 pm
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lettingo
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Have you considered joining a CODA group? Since this seems to be a reoccuring thing for you it might help to get into a 12 step program. CoDA is excellent. Just a thought. I don't know how much will power helps in the light of underlining issues.

May 29, 2007
2:22 pm
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fantas
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((((Santino))))...Iam so excited for you right now!!!! I feel your determination to end this and draw your boundary with your ex. Good for you!!! I send you lots of positive energy and well wishes..

May 29, 2007
3:30 pm
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santino
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Thanks all!

It's the only way I can ever be happy. Being in contact with her is not making me happy, it's making her happy and thats not fair to me. She has to make her own choices on her own, ultimately shes the one who has to live with the decisions shes made, not me. I have to live with the choices I make, and now my choices is to continue with the no contact. Thanks for the strenght all, all your words have helped me to this point. 🙂

May 30, 2007
11:28 am
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santino
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Good morning all! Still feeling strong! 🙂

May 30, 2007
11:33 am
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fantas
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((((Santino)))) Keep up the strength...

May 30, 2007
2:08 pm
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taj64
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Yes you can do this again. LIfe has it ups and downs. This situation with your ex is not going to be in your life always. Someday you won't even think about her and this will be just a page in your history. You show strength and will and determination to make your life better. You may have had some slip ups here and there but you always manage to get right back on your feet and handle the problems head on. I think there is a lady out there that will more than appreciate you. And it will happen and hopefull you are over the ex then and then the new girl will be a focus for you and not just a distraction from something else. I see this happening for you. Hang in there like you always do.

May 30, 2007
2:11 pm
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santino
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Thanks fantas, yeah it's tuff, but whenever I began to dwell, I think of her using me and me getting hurt and that has seemed to help. My life is drama free, and I'd like to keep it that way. My kids and I hung out yesterday and we had a great time! I showed them that I am fun and I'm not gonna let anyone or anything ruin our time together! Thanks!

May 30, 2007
2:13 pm
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santino
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Hi Taj!! I was hoping you would come across my thread, your words have always been good to read! Thanks for the encouragement! I hope things are going good for you too! 🙂

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