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I cannot place my anger
September 1, 2006
1:36 am
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shannonle
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September 24, 2010
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I cannot place my anger; I am angry at people. My father sexually assaulted me... which he denies to this day. I hate men. I thought that I grew from my father's abuse; I was extremely proud of the individual I became. I was confident, arrogant even at times! I thought as a teenager I could overcome anything, considering what I had endured. In 2002, a supervisor at a large corporation that I worked for raped me, and he had no repercussions. After a year, I went back to work with animals... which I have always been passionate about. My mother, who had become my rock, passed away in April of 2006. I am overwhelmed with anger now. I am pissed my father was an asshole that suffered nothing, I am pissed I allowed myself to be in a position to be raped by a Supervisor who suffered nothing, and I am pissed my family didn't see what I saw. It's not really my whole family... but my eldest brother. He never visited my Mom when she was sick, and now is insistent on being involved with my Mom's affairs. I have never told him how deeply he disgusts me, or how much hatred I have towards him. I try to tolerate him because he is my family; but I cannot stand who he is or what he stands for. As an employer, I am angry with my employees and have very little patience. If they do not do what I want, it infuriates me! I am having weekly meetings with them hoping they understand what I want. If they can't get it, then it's time for them to move on. I don't feel like what I ask of them is difficult... but I am so damn tired of repeating myself; their job is not a difficult one!

I feel like I am angry all them time and I need help managing myself.

September 1, 2006
5:27 am
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ggfred4
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September 30, 2010
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shannonie,
I have had similar experiences and yet I behave oppositely; no anger. It is all there inside hiding. As an employer, you are going to have to deal with this a.s.a.p. People should WANT to work for you and do their best because of mutual respect. Because you do not respect them,it is probably vice versa. The problem is, what advice do I give? It really sounds like you need immediate counseling to deal with this anger. Do you have a close friend that you have shared with?

September 1, 2006
8:27 am
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lollipop3
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September 29, 2010
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Hi Shannole and welcome.

I agree with gg...it sounds like some counseling is in order.

Given what you have described it is perfectly understandable and natural for you to feel angry. However, your anger is affecting you, personally and professionally. It seems like it may be time to involve a professional that can help you sort through all of these feelings and help you to deal with them in a more constructive, healthy way.

The first (and sometimes hardest) step is admitting you have a problem, which you have done. Now it's time to accept that reality and get the help you need to overcome this.

In addition to professional help...this site is also a wonderful place to come for support, wisdom and insight....it's also a great place to vent....so keep posting.

Good luck ,
Lolli

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