Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
I called again
October 8, 2004
2:24 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I just called him again. It is getting bad.
I think I keep waiting for him to say what I want to hear, but he isn't going to.

Any advice to help me stop calling him

October 8, 2004
2:27 pm
Avatar
SweetAmanda
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I can't find your other post. You called your ex again, right? You've been apart for several months...and he is with someone new, but he says he's not that happy? You said you argue with him a lot? What's the name of your post, so I can catch up... Amanda

October 8, 2004
2:38 pm
Avatar
Cici
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

this almost sounds like a compulsion. you don't want to call him but can't help it? hmmm.

put your phone in the freezer?

October 8, 2004
2:46 pm
Avatar
SweetAmanda
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

[email protected]! That's a good idea though! Well, what I do whenever I get dumped/end a relationship: I get rid of all contact info. Then, I forget it over time. *lol* And, I make myself not call him! No matter what! Hey, maybe there is someway you can put a block on your phone to that number? I dunno. Amanda

October 8, 2004
2:56 pm
Avatar
Cici
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I also do this thing where I create a makeshift "sponsor" - someone who is close to me, who knows the situation, and who is willing to let me call them whenever I get the urge to call the evil one.

October 8, 2004
3:06 pm
Avatar
Anonymous
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

That works really well, I do this thing and its called sadistic satisfaction, the more you don't call the more they wonder why you don't call. Other than that, I picture them with someone else and all sorts of things that would make me not WANT to call. IT works mind over matter.

October 8, 2004
3:57 pm
Avatar
tenderheart
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Be strong...Before you call try and remember the last time you called and how you felt after he didn't respond the way you wanted him to. Aces is right the more you don't call, the better because your not giving him a chance to look for you or for that matter a chance to see if he does care. In the meantime try and keep yourself occupied with doing things for yourself. By calling him your only hurting yourself. So start looking out for starryslp and give yourself more credit. You don't deserve to feel the way you do.

October 8, 2004
4:20 pm
Avatar
Anonymous
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

No more calling, when you feel you need to call, jump on here.

October 8, 2004
4:29 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

You all are great....I kind of feel like I can talk to you all more than my close friends....

I just can't believe someone can move on from something that was so strong at one time.

And I can't accept it. I took all his info out of my phone, but it is all in my memory...along with lots of memories.

October 8, 2004
4:37 pm
Avatar
Anonymous
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

They will fade, and then you will be happier finding out about you!!!!!

October 8, 2004
6:20 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Does anyone else have a hard time with guilt over being the cause of why things didn't work out.
The guilt is almost unbearable..Today is just a really hard day for me.

October 8, 2004
6:24 pm
Avatar
Anonymous
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I KNOW THAT FEELING. I hate it when you think ohh well it didn't work because of me, if I had done this when it comes down to is that it didn't work because it wasn't suppose to work. That is it. People change, people move on, people hurt people. But in essence what happened is suppose to happen. Besides nothing is ever ONE persons fault entirely. Im sure he partook in a lot of this blame game as well.

October 8, 2004
6:27 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

It just bugs me that he seems so ok with being over. And that he keeps me hanging on. Just when I think I can move on, he does something nice. And only today did he admit to me he lived with another girl. He has been with her for 5 months, and didn't want me to know.
Plus, I let him do all this

October 8, 2004
6:54 pm
Avatar
CAMER
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 100
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

when you want to call him DONT....just post here your feelings...we will support you and get you thru these tough times. Promise!
camer

October 12, 2004
5:56 pm
Avatar
natty
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Starryslp I can SO relate to your problem. I am trying to break free of a very very toxic man. Even though I know he is awful, I am finding it damn hard not to pick up the phone.
Jump on here instead of calling - also write a long list of all the reasons you should not call and tape it to the phone.

October 12, 2004
6:03 pm
Avatar
Patarino
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Natty
the list on the phone is a FANTASTIC idea! I am going to try it right now. I am also fond of the freezer idea but my cell phone would die ... heh! I use my cell phone when I am driving and the list taped to it ... well I am thinking there is hope. Also, I think it is a compulsion. I hate myself for doing it.
I just read a few positngs back ... aces, I like the sadistic satisfaction method too. You are all so wonderful ... again thanks for being here. You can never know how much a stupid posting can change your destiny.

October 12, 2004
6:10 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Patarino,
Isn't it great to feel like you have a friend who totally understands..i am grateful for all this help.

I made a list of all the bad things he did to me, and highlighted to worst ones...I keep trying to look at that constantly...It is helping some.

October 12, 2004
6:29 pm
Avatar
art angel
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Starry,
Thanks for the reply to my post- and I also have a hard time not calling...I honestly don't know how I don't! Maybe I am stronger than I think I am... but it still does hurt. How someone could leave something with so much potential and goodness in it, and the lie all the time on top of that.... I'm here for you too! ~Artangel *hugs

October 12, 2004
6:32 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I know. I think my ex was dating his new live in before i moved. It sure makes a few things make sense to me.

And all his lies to keep me around...
we deserve better...easy to say, hard to believe.

October 12, 2004
10:49 pm
Avatar
Patarino
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I called again too. Didn't want to admit it but this is what this website is for right. To feel ashamed is pointless ... just another day. Only now I have someone to tell. I did make it longer than ever before ...
How did I get into this mess ... how do I get out?????

October 12, 2004
11:40 pm
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

patrino,

did you call tonight,,, i am just about to go to bed after day 4 of no contact. i know it is so hard hon, but you have to take the time for yourself, if you want to make your relationship work..take some time.

believe me, i would give anything to have the info i have now when i still had a chance to save my relationship.

October 13, 2004
3:03 am
Avatar
Patarino
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey starry
yes tongiht. But it went well. She asked me to stay there tonight. I actually told her no. I just need some real "no contact" time. I really, really do. If i make it through a day she would freak out. I know it. How can I every make progress if I stand in the same spot all the time. One day is a lifetime for me. If I could do 1 then I could do 2 you know? I think I am just scared too. I am scared to feel good ... to feel good and not miss her and not talk to her and have her want me but want it to end anyway. Why would a smart girl be afraid of something like that? Jeez ...

October 13, 2004
3:28 am
Avatar
mamacinnamon
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 0
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Are you having trouble coz you don't know WHY things ended? Sometimes we never get the answers.

You need to take the weekend and grieve. Gets the pics out, remember all the good times, cry, cry, cry. Then put it away in a taped box or burn it. Get mad, get up and go on. When you want to call think on the bad things. Get mad. And actually, it is a time thing. It does get easier w/ time.

October 13, 2004
10:11 am
Avatar
starryslp
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

patarino,

I know what you mean. I am a smart girl, and I can't keep my mind off of my ex. I tend to remember all the sweet things he did,,,, which at least for me, isnt good.

I think we shouldn't let them have control, and us calling them gives them control.

I made a get over ____ folder. On the front I have a calender for the next 21 days, and everynight I cross of the day. I also have printed some posts i think remind me to be strong... and other things on the internet I find that have helped. I have so much stuff, maybe when I am healed I will write a book.

I am so proud of you for not staying with her....It is a step.

October 13, 2004
10:17 am
Avatar
Patarino
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thanks starry
I have to drop my little dog off there this morning. I am supposed to call on my way. I called ... she was EVIL! She is mad because I am not upset ... mad because I stayed here last night. She hung up on me ... says it's my fault. Great way to start the day but at least it gives some fuel for the fire. Burn baby burn!

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
22
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110964
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38560
Posts: 714253
Newest Members:
samzy12, mycvdesigner, JayGriffin212, Youse1937, Cannabeme, charli55
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information