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Hurting today
October 11, 2006
7:57 pm
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kasie919
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Army,

have you made the call??

October 11, 2006
7:57 pm
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armyleo
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I've told no one but you guys

October 11, 2006
7:57 pm
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mamacinnamon
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((( YOU ARE BEIN HELD )))

If you are having trouble catching your breath cup your hands over your mouth and breath in and out w/o moving your hands away. Or a paper bag would do well. You may be doin some hyperventilating. Breath in slow and out slow. If you feel more dizzy put your head down between your knees or lay onthe bed w/ your head over the edge. Keep it lower than your heart.

October 11, 2006
7:58 pm
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kasie919
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are your girls there with you?

are they ok?

Please tell me something im gona be ill, im worried sick about you..

October 11, 2006
7:58 pm
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mamacinnamon
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You have to come out of the closet sometime honey. Now w/ the bruises is honestly the very best time. You need to let the hospital check you out and your arm.

October 11, 2006
8:00 pm
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armyleo
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kasie,

I'm here I can't go on I can't do it

October 11, 2006
8:01 pm
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kasie919
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Army,

I know what you have been through, you know i do,

You are a wonderfull mom, and a good person, people who degrade and abuse are just insecure about getting CAUGHT..his threats are whats keeping you..

If there is anything that i have learned on this site, it is to take a stand, step up, fight back, and allow your heart to heal..

I know how hurt you are, but please think of your girls praying for you right now, in secret, begging ther mom in there prayers to get help..

I know they are..

October 11, 2006
8:03 pm
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kasie919
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yes you can go on..

I promise you when you step out of that house and into a world of kindness, caring, loving people, you will have such a weight taken off your shoulder..

Please honey, dopnt give in to him, he wants for you to not go on,

fight back, fight hard..

October 11, 2006
8:03 pm
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Jenni
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YES, you CAN do this, Army!! You'd be surprised of all the things you can do!

Pick up that phone and dial...

October 11, 2006
8:04 pm
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armyleo
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mama,

I don't know he boss, or supervisor, he never tells me anything, I never get to go to events at the station.

I went to a little community church 6 months ago, I , he only let me go 2 sundays, he made me stop. It felt peaceful in the church

October 11, 2006
8:05 pm
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kasie919
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Army

please, please see you have the right to be free..

please ..

do you have a car??

can you drive to another hospital outside of his territory?

October 11, 2006
8:08 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Army,

(((hugs))) so many hugs to you, I hope that you can feel them today.

Listen Army, Child Prtective Services got involved in my situation today, it was very tough. Everyone has always seen my husband as a good guy. But, nobody sees what we face here at home. I fear losing my kids, among a lot of other things. People know that I am a GOOD mom to my kids. I inderstand you wanting to die way better than I wish that I did. Army, you have to do this for you and your girls. Please listen to mama, PLEASE. She is here because she TRULY cares. I care, we all do. Army, I faced a very tough day today, and tomorrow isn't going to be any easier, but I didn't ask for my situation, and niether did you. You are a great person Army, no matter what you think, you are. It is tough Army, but PICK UP THE PHONE. It is time for you to be safe, and your girls. It will be them one day, or he will hurt you bad enough that they are all he has to beat on. You have been raped, beaten, psychologically damaged....Pick yourself up Army, we will do this together. Go to the hospital...WE CAN DO THIS TOGETHER....I believe that honey. You are not alone..Many of us here care so very much, get out of there, go to the hospital, it is time to fight for you, it is time for Army to be safe, you can do this, I am doing it with you, PLEASE lets be safe together, and protect our kids TOGETHER.

Love and MANY MANY hugs today..

October 11, 2006
8:08 pm
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kasie919
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How peacefull church is, and i bet if your anything like me you cried all the way throught the sermon didnt you??

God was ther with you, just as he is right now..

What if your husband comes home so irate he beats your girls?? I know they want to stand up for you..

They love you, just as much as you love them..

I know its scary being alone, but id rahter be alone than have to live in hell with lucifer....

October 11, 2006
8:10 pm
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armyleo
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Oh God... I think he's home...

You guys pray for me...

Mama,

don't hate ne or be mad, I'm more scared but someone knows now, It's not my secret anymore

October 11, 2006
8:10 pm
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kasie919
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Hey Scared::

Read some of your posts, dont you worry either, they will know just how good a mom you are..

Dont give up the fight, your not gonna loose your kids..

I will keep you in my prayers..

Love hugs, and even BIGGER HUGS

kasie

October 11, 2006
8:11 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Honey...

Armyleo...

IF YOU CANNOT THEN YOU CANNOT. I am not pressuring you; please don't think I am. But if you cannot then you listen to me ok.

This WILL NOT stop. This will happen again and again. When he gets bored w/ you then he might (I said might) turn to your girls for his pleasure. Stats show it happens. Do you hear me?

I care very much about you and what is goin no here. I cannot help if you don't want it and if you don't I won't push. BUT, you need to know what you are facing if you don't.

Do you understand what I am trying to say to you? Can I have another name to cal you by. I feel closer to you than Armyleo. Pick sue, or joy or anything.....

I will continue praying for you and I will hold you close to my heart. I will support you as much as possible here. I would outside if I could.

Now, You decide what you can do. Nobody will think bad of you either way honey. I have been where you are. I went back to my evil x when he broke into my folks house where I was staying and he choked me and told me come home or he'd kill everyone in the house but me. I believed him then. What I should have done was start fignting and screaming. Men like this are really cowards. That is why they do this to their wives and girlfriends. I went back honey. It took me 7 more years before I could go. I knew in my heart he would kill me if i tried to leave. He told me so; he showed me so. One day I finally got it in my head that he would let me lay there and die to not be inconvenienced to take me to a hospital. Honey I was only 4 blocks from my folks and I couldn't call them. I was embarrassed. Silly me.

I want to tell you that he is not as big and bad as he is making himself out to be. If he were you'd be dead by now if he threatens you. If he were folks would lock their doors when he walked down the street.

You can do this. Of this I am sure. You are there. Just take that step. I did and I'm doin great. He cannot touch me ever again. It's the same for you. He has you scared. He has you hornswaggled.

Honey I am here for you anytime. You just call. ok. I'll stay w/ you now for a bit if you'd like, but no pressurings.

October 11, 2006
8:12 pm
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kasie919
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army please let me know your ok im not gonna be able to sleep, please..

Please get help..

I will be here for you..

October 11, 2006
8:14 pm
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kasie919
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army??

October 11, 2006
8:16 pm
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kasie919
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mama this is so hard,

i felt a connection to Army, I have walked in her shoes, I feel her pain and i cant help her, im a mess in tears, begging God to help her..

How come someone can be so cruel, heartless, unkind, damaging, foul??

Why?/ why do we allow this to happen to us??

i can feel her pained arms, i knw the sexual abuse she withstands, how can i help her mama??

My heart is just torn apart...

October 11, 2006
8:22 pm
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armyleo
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I'm making my self paranoid now, I heard a car.

I feel so sick, and I can't stop shaking,

In a way I feel better for telling

mama, please don't aabandon me if I can't do it right now, I know you said you wouldn't. I don't like armyleo either. I won't like the name anymore,

Scared, you make me cry, but I love you...You did great better than me, I'm a looser, he's always telling me that.

Kasie and evryone else thanjks for being here

He'll be home soon but not yet. stay a bit, I can't hold anything down I think it's the nerves

October 11, 2006
8:23 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Kasie:

You can give her moral support and you can pray for her. That's about it. It is a step SHE has to take. You know that from when you took your step. Nobody did it for you. You just had finally had enough.

I cannot keep pushing her because if she leaves and then goes back the abuse may get worse. SHE has to take that step. None of us can do it for her. We can only empower her as everyone here did you.

So, Kasiegirl... pray hard, keep a kind heart, help empower her if you can. You can only do what you can do.

I'm gonna go get something for dinner, will be back soon.

October 11, 2006
8:25 pm
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mamacinnamon
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It's the nerves. So, what shall we call you w/n the posts.

I will not abandon you. Here for you always. Just like the others.

(((holding you close)))

October 11, 2006
8:26 pm
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armyleo
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scared, how did you do it,, how did you get the courage to do what you did?

Kassie - I can't write because of the tears, will you still be here?

October 11, 2006
8:26 pm
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red blonde
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Army,

Do what Kasie and Mama are telling you to do.

Another thing the dept. will do besides investigating is make him go to counseling or for a psych exam.

CALL 911

If you are afraid of others knowing CALL the POLICE CHIEF.

BUT PLEASE! PLEASE GET OUT OF THAT HOUSE WITH THE KIDS!

DON'T LET HIM DO THIS TO YOU!
YOU ARE NOT WORTHLESS!
YOU ARE NOT STUPID!

YOU ARE BEING CONTROLLED AND LITERALLY HELD PRISONER BY YOUR H
WHO IS SUPPOSED TO HELP, PROTECT and SERVE OTHERS.
IF HE IS THREATENING YOU - GET OUT OF THERE! NOW! DON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELF and DON'T DO THIS TO YOUR KIDS. THEY KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON. THEY ARE SCARED TOO!

There are some of us that have been in your situation, maybe alot of us,
please LISTEN to us.

GET OUT OF THERE NOW!

October 11, 2006
8:29 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Army, I said we can do this TOGETHER...Please hear my heart honey, I am hurting bad, but I know that there is a light at the end of my tunnel. I know there is at yours too, but you have to want it bad enough. Army, pick yourself up, and do the right thing for you and those girls. You deserve to be free from this abuse...PLEASE. Mama is right, we can't make the choice for you. Just like mama couldn't stop me from killing myself if that is what I wanted to do. BUT, I am trying to listen to the ONLY people that care about me. Those people are right here screaming at us both, because they want us to be happy, Come on, quit listening to his worthless lies about you. He is calling you everything that he sees in the morning when he looks in the mirror. Anyone that miserable Army, has to make others around them miserable. Don't be his doormat anymore, join me on my adventure to freedom, I deserve it, AND SO DO YOU. Together Army, we CAN do this. Don't make me go it alone....I need a friend to go through this with me...PLEASE Army, come with me. Get the help that you need, and find freedom, and peace

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