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how do you fill the void (a question for Camer and anyone else)
November 6, 2004
4:30 pm
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art angel
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Camer,

You said something about filling that empty void you feel with love for yourself...how do you do this? Anyone have any thoughts or ideas?

Cause I feel a void, and it's not just caused by my recent break up (although a lot of it is)-- and it hurts.

November 6, 2004
4:40 pm
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CAMER
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i read this in "women who love too much" by Melody Beattie....you hug yourself daily, tell yourself daily that you love yourself, and you have to mean this!!! in order for any healthy relationship, you need to be healthy yourself and love yourself.

Also, try to stop any negative tapes running thru your head and replace them with positive ones.

So put your arms out and give yourself a big ol' hug and squeeze tight and mean it...it does help!! i used to do this alot, when my last bf took his life, I felt so alone and empty, and had to take a year and 7 mos off from dating to be
healthy again.

I wish you luck & support!

(((camer)))

November 6, 2004
4:42 pm
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art angel
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Thanks Camer! I will do this!

hugs ((Camer))

art angel

November 6, 2004
4:54 pm
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CAMER
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(((art angel))) here is a very good quote from "women who love too much"

"you will have to face the terrible emptiness within that surfaces when you are not focused on SOMEONE ELSE. Sometimes the emptiness will be so deep, you will almost be able to feel the wind blowing thru the place where your heart should be. Allow yourself to feel it, in all its intensity (otherwise you will look for another unhealthy way to distract yourself) Embrace the EMPTINESS and know that you will not always feel this way and just by holding STILL and feeling it you will being to fill it with the warmth of SELF ACCEPTANCE.

"Let your support group help you with this. Their acceptance can also help fill the void, as can your own projects and activities. We achieve a sense of self from what we do for
OURSELVES and how we develop our own
capacities. If all of your efforts have gone into developing others, your bound to feel empty. Take your turn now".....

These 2 paragrapsh above I live by, or at least try my hardest too,

Keep hugging yourself, keep looking and the mirror with "I love you" and keep knowing you are worth it, and
believe in it too!!!

(((hugs & love & support)))) camer

November 6, 2004
5:07 pm
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art angel
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Camer,

Thanks for writing that out for me. I will print it so I always have it. You are so smart. Thank you for being here for me. 🙂

(((hugs, love and support back)))

art angel

November 6, 2004
5:10 pm
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bubishi76
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Hey Art

November 6, 2004
5:22 pm
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CANSADAdeTODO
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Tai Chi , you will love it
simple , useful and relaxing

November 6, 2004
9:05 pm
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workinonit
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art angel, another book that helped me was Succulent Wild Women, by Sark.

This focus was on positive things you could do to free yourself from your codep bonds. Ways to go out by yourself, explore your own thoughts, reveal your inner child and on and on.

Check it out!

November 7, 2004
12:56 pm
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CAMER
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oops, the 2nd post i wrote on this thread, wrong author...Women who love too much is by Robin Norwood.

Melody Beattie, has some great books out there too on codependency.

Just didn't want to mix any of this up incase someone was going to purchase a book.

Peace & love to all!

November 9, 2004
9:35 pm
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princess44
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Camer: I not sure how this thread emailing works, but wanted to thank you for your response to obesessing. You reminded me what I have know and practiced for many years now. Just got a little nuts over the weekend. I have many blessings. I have many optios and choices now and for my future. Thanks again for your direct words.

November 9, 2004
9:55 pm
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CAMER
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hi Princess and welcome, and I do enjoy sharing whatever valuable info I have with the group, I am glad it helped you. Hope everything in your life is going ok.....((camer))

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