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How do I stop anaylizing everything?
March 8, 2006
3:03 pm
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caraway
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I question everything, have trouble trusting, and look for a way to feel like a victim. WHY?

I recognize the problem but can't seem to stop it. I am tired of stuggling with this?

Hollie

March 8, 2006
3:09 pm
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Ok so you want to analyze why you want to analyze. I'm getting dizzy... helppp! Sorry, just playing.

What are the specific things that are worrying you? How about committing to think positively every time no matter? I have to do that too.

March 8, 2006
5:01 pm
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artist 2
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My advice: "Don't sweat the small stuff." Take a step back and say to yourself, "yes I see that, but what else is there?"

March 8, 2006
5:03 pm
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revelation
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Caraway,

mmm hmmm...me too! Well, at least in my last relationship I tended to do this. I was looking for the cracks before they appeared. When I went to counselling, I realised, this was behaviour leftover from my childhood. Not sure if its the same for you? As a child I was basically my parents marriage counsellor (Well, I thought I was!) They had (still have) a stormy relationship and the fights would come in waves. We'd have say 3 weeks of calm, peace and quiet and then all hell would break loose, and there would be violence, shouting, silent-treatments etc.etc. for a few weeks, then all of a sudden it would stop and they (my parents) would be all over each other again! So as a result, during the calm periods I would walk on eggshells, constantly waiting for the storm to erupt again and trying my best to appease them both so as it didn't (I actually believed as a little girl that if I was really really good there would be no more fighting...and they let me believe this!) So, as an adult when I was in a relationship, I never believed it was going to be ok, I was always waiting for the sh*t to hit the fan, always hyper-aware, looking for the cracks...tapping away waiting for the cracks to appear. Once I realised that this was the cause, my counsellor just said this "Just because that happened when you are a child, doesn't mean it always has to happen when you are an adult"

Its quite simple really...look back and think of a time in your life when your happiness was unstable...when you had reason not to trust in the good-times, when you had reason to think negatively, and then realise that it doesn't always have to be that way for you. If you are in a relationship now however, where there is reason not to trust or not to feel secure...then you need to get out of it...but if your fears are completely not warranted, then don't entertain them, you don't have to...turn every negative thought into a positive.

March 8, 2006
6:49 pm
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bonni
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i do this too, its part of who i am and is probably the main reason for whatever success I have. I'm working on some cognitive therapy, yoga and meditation. trying to be conscious of controlling my thoughts. plus sometimes i just put it out here. the writing it out is like purging it from my brain.

March 8, 2006
8:59 pm
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Rasputin
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Caraway - Analysis is not something bad. I am an anlytical person and believe me analyzing things is something very smart as long as you do not Overdo it.

Analysis helps you to discern, decipher, figure understand, act, react etc.

I tend to anlayze people, situations, attitudes etc. As long as I use analysis moderately I am fine. When I go overboard and I know that; I really tend to go nuts and lose my focus and peace, and like anything in our life "More is less."

Used moderately and smartly, being analytical is very smart trait which even tho I am an emotional person, yet I possess it and I'm very proud of using it moderately.

~Ras~

March 9, 2006
9:57 am
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caraway
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"Over-doing" it what I do best. I am very sensitive the actions and reactions of those around me and read far too much into what is said or done.

I fear that one day I will go over the edge and become some crazy person who is incapable of a normal life.

I am in a realtionship now for about a year. I have talked to some of you about it in the last couple of months. I am not able to relax and enjoy the good parts of the relationship because of the constant second guessing. I take every action, comment, etc. and assume that it means something more. I personalize most everything.

I project to the future and assume that things are surely going to end badly, so I should end them now; before the other person proves me right.

Cary

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