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how can I help a good friend?
August 11, 2001
9:12 pm
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ms. T
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September 29, 2010
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I have a friend that I love dearly, and I have been watching her life be consumed by a man I believe to be a sociopath since February. I have tried desperately to help her see the light. He has manipulated her emotionally and has brought her into his web of financial failure by getting her to pay bills, make purchases, etc., which has put her in a bind. She has a young daughter and has been trying to get divorced for THREE YEARS! How can I help her to see that she doesn't need to feel sympathy for this man -- she is a real nurturer to a fault.

August 12, 2001
11:34 am
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Katherine
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September 27, 2010
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I don't know that there is anything you can do. I was in a situation like your friend, involved with a manipulator who would run up my phone bill with calls to a 900 number while I was gone, among many other things. My parents tried to get me to stop seeing him, knew he was trouble, but all that did was push me away from them. Even my therapist would not tell me to get out of it, would just point out different "red flags" that she noticed when we talked. She did, however, recommend a book that helped me very much called "Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them" by Dr. Susan Forward. It might give you some ideas, or if she actually sees that something is wrong but is not sure what, it may give her the courage and actual sight (love is blind) to get out of the relationship.
Kate

August 13, 2001
9:25 am
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janes
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Ditto...be supportive, open and honest but only she can make the change.

Direct her to this website or to

drireneverbal abuse site

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