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Honesty
October 22, 2005
5:43 am
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littleminky
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September 29, 2010
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I am really lucky i have my health, great family, some strange friendships. lovely man who loves me. But ......
I always have this nagging feeling. I should be really happy content, i am very grateful and feel guilty to admit to myself that i have this nagging feeling.
I talk to lots of people and when i look into their eyes im looking for a similar connection.
But some appear to have no questioning, why, why, why, do i have this silly brain that makes me think and question. is their any purpose to it.
I look around and i am truly grateful, but if im honest to myself i have this constant looking.(a knawing inside). In my heart i know there is nowhere to look all you need is right in this moment.
But i feel like im trying to convince myself i dont truly feel it.
I feel bad about that because i should be happy and content.
I know life is precious, i breathe in every moment and are thankful for each one.So what is my bloody problem.

October 22, 2005
8:21 am
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newcode
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September 30, 2010
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Well, maybe you answered your own question... You say you 'should' feel happy and content...SHOULD?? Why should you? Because that is what is expected of you?

I am just giving a guess here, but maybe you long for some deeper human connection -- something that you do not currently have, in spite of the loving people in your life?

I know that is my main issue...

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